Damien: Everybody hates me!
Mr.Mackey: Why do you suppose that is?
Damien: Because I'm the son of the devil!
Mr.Mackey: Uh huh that's a good start, why else?
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Kyle: You bastards!
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Mr.Garrison: What kind of sick weirdo are you?
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Kyle: Say some thing Mr. Hankey.
Mr.Hankey: Aaaaah
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny! Dude, Kenny is dead.
Chef: Hello there children. Let me sing you a little song:
I'm gonna make love to you woman
Officer Barbrady: Well you ain't Fiona Apple,
and if you ain't Fiona Apple I don't give a rat's ass.
Reporter: What would drive a man to such a disgusting act?
Some Woman: My god that's disgusting!
Stan: Whoa dude, how do you have sex with a chicken?
Stan: At least im not a little pig fucker.
Cartman: God damn it!
Stan: Dude!
Kyle: Huh Sick
Mr.Hankey: Aaaah
Cartman: You get you bitch ass back in the kitchen, and make me some pie!
Mr.Garrison: You got to hell!
Stan: You butt plug.
Kyle: Damn!
Cartman: Well screw you too.
Cartman: Well?
Ms.Cartman: Sure Hun.
Cartman: Kick Ass!
Cartman: Hey, ill blow your freakin head off you peice of crap!
Mr.Mackey: I mean your one screwed up little kid, do you understand?
Cartman: He is a very disturbed little boy.
Ms.Cartman: You want some Cheesy Poofs?
Cartman: Yeah I want Cheesy Poofs!
Ms.Cartman: You can have a eensy weensy bit can't you?
Cartman: Well?
Ms.Cartman: Just a weensy eensy woo-woo?
Cartman: Okay!
Ms. Cartman: I bought you some Cheesy Poofs and Happy tarts!
Cartman: God Damnit!
Ms.Cartman: Just a weensy eensy woo-woo?
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Kyle: You bastards!
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Mr.Garrison: What kind of sick weirdo are you?
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Kyle: Say some thing Mr. Hankey.
Mr.Hankey: Aaaah!
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny. Dude, Kenny is dead.
Mr.Garrison: Dumb ass, what a retard!
Stan: You fat fuck!
Kyle: Screw You.
Stan: Dude.
Mr.Garrison: Don't be such a little wuss!
Officer Barbrady: Fruitcake!
Cartman: Bitch.
Wendy: No, I'm not acting like a freak!
Cartman: Well I was standing out in a field and I had this huge satellite dish
sticking out of my butt, and then there were hundereds of cows and aliens, and
then I went up on the ship, and Scott Baio gave me pinkeye!
Stan: What the hell are you talking about!
Mr. Garrison: There are no stupid questions, just stupid people!
Wendy: Barf is gross!
Cartman: Nobody gives a rat's ass!
Pippins: Lunchy munchy hmm!
Stan: Oh yeah? Well at least my moms not on the cover of Crack Whore magazine!
Cartman: Damnit, would you shut the hell up?
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Kyle: You bastards!
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Starvin' Marvin: Yeah I want da cheezy poof!
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny!
Mr.Hankey: Howdy Ho!
Stan: Oh my god they killed Kenny. Dude, Kenny is dead.
Cartman: Son of a bitch.
Jesus: Yay, believe in me, and ye shall find peace, the way is paved with gold for ye who seek truth!
Ring Announcer: Wearing very very black trunks...the king of all that is evil...
Towns People: Barbara Striesand, Barbera Striesand!
Barbera Striesand: I'm Barbera Striesand!
Chef: Barbera Striesand?
Leonard Maltin: Barbera Striesand.
Kyle: Kick the baby!
Ike: Don't kick the baby!
Leonard Maltin: Leonard Maltin.
Leonard Maltin: Sydney Potier.
Chef: Sydney Potier?!
Stan: Oh yeah.
B.S.: Your some little hick!
Stan: You ugly skank!
Cartman: Damn your black heart, Barbera Stiesand! Hey! Why dont you stop dressin' me up like a mailman, and making me dance for you, while you go and smoke crack in your bedroom and have sex with some guy I don't even know on my dad's bed!
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I need some real advice please read all of this an comment.
I fucked my friends mom. I was in my 20's and she was in her 50's. She was married at the time. This is how it happened no bullshit here you cant make up shit like this. Real life can be fuckin crazy. One day i am over at my friends parents house, He doesnt live in town so when he comes here he stays at his parents. So i am over there sitting on the couch an his mom sits down next to me and starts talking about how i am her favorite of all his friends an what a good person i am. I just agree and bemuse her. She has one of those weird personalities where she is overly nice to most people.
She then starts talking to me about movies "we both like old western movies". Later a weeks a couple days i don't remember she calls me. Tells me that she wants to talk with me an invites herself over to my house. I did not give her my number. She comes over tells me some bullshit i forget what it was some kind of excuse to get into my house. We talk for a few hours and i notice her looking at my cock through my pants. I ignore it because hey she my friends mom. Plus she is overweight an she looks old. On the positive side She does have a big ass and very large tits easily DD if not bigger.
She leaves an tells me how wonderful it was to get out of the house an how we have so much in common. Then she invites herself over for the next week an we make plans to watch a old western. Between these 2 visits i talk with a guy i work with about it. He tells me "she wants to fuck you" I am more of a recluse and i don't date much plus she was married. So i didn't believe it. But the next time i talked to her son i told him "Hey man i think your mom wants to fuck me." he replied Do it an we both laughed him thinking it was a joke and me thinking i just might.
So the scheduled visit arrives and she comes over wearing a hoody not showing any skin. we are watching a movie i look over and the hoody is unzipped an she is showing some cleavage. She always sat uncomfortably close to me and i could see down her shirt. I got aroused she looked over at me then down at my pants an she just put her hand on my cock acting innocent like she had no idea what had happened. I called her out an she pretty much rapes me.
Now i fucked her once an it did not leave me feeling good about the situation because of her marriage and my friendship with her son. The sex although taboo was not that great she just laid there like most women. I told myself never again.
A few days later she calls me an tells me she is coming over we need to talk blah blah. So she comes over an we are sitting next to each other and she tries to grab my cock. I told her no it was just a one time thing an i think we would be better as friends. She tells me don't Worry i don't feel bad about it an neither should you. She then tells me she hasn't fucked her husband in 5 years and they are all but divorced in name alone. She then tells me that she will never tell anyone about it and it will be are little secret. I was hesitant she saw it and just took her tits out. Yeah i fucked her again.
So we made it a regular thing twice a week for 2 years she called it "movie night"
I told her that we couldn't really be together in a real relationship.various reasons age an the fact she was married. She said that was okay because it was just labels an she didn't care about that as long as i fucked her.
In the 2 years i fucked her in the ass several times. Made her squirt many times. And in general fucked her like a whore. She told me she had never squirted before me an i could do anything i wanted. I took advantage.
Towards the end of this friends with benefits. Her husband came over to my house looking for her an she was just sitting in my room with her tit out. He was pretty pissed. Some how she convinced him that she was wearing a shirt an he was acting like a crazy person. But the story got back to my friend through his brothers friend who was the guy who showed her husband where i lived. Pretty sure he was fucking her at one time also. She always let her sons friends move in when they needed a place to stay. He was one of those friends who needed a place to stay.
So my friend called me about it. I told him yeah i fucked her an we talked about some other stuff. I have a way of being sarcastic all the time. She proceeded to convince him i was just fuckin with him. ?he bought it?
More time passed. This is where the fucked up shit happens. There was a girl i used to fuck when i was younger we had a real casual sexual relationship. She would come over to my house drunk at late hours an demand that i fuck her. It was awesome at 1st but i got tried of the bitch waking me up an one night i told her not to come over anymore. She did an i only saw her a couple of times after that. After we stopped fucking she got a job at a bar. One of the regulars pursued her for some time they ended up dating an she got pregnant. He was 10 years older then her an she didnt love him but she married him. We did not talk to each other but saw each other at my neighbors garage sale. She then knew where i lived.I remember thinking if i get the chance i am going to fuck her again.
So one night Guess who is at my door. Yep it was her she made up an excuse to talk to me an i let her in. She was in my house about 5 mins when i realized this was my chance. We ended up fooling around really hot an heavy an she tells me she has to leave or she is going to fuck me an she cant she is married. We exchange emails.
I was completely in lust and never had i been swept up in emotions over girl. She was in the same boat we confirmed are intentions via email an she came over the next night. We fucked it was amazing she is beautiful an her pussy was really really wet.
After the fact she told me she wanted to be with me an that she always had. I told her i needed to stop my previous relationship with my friends mom. She told me she needed to leave her husband. Next day she told her husband and i told my friends mom. My friends mom was like okay i understand but i still want to fuck you. She then told me don't worry no one will find out. The thought of fucking both of them was appealing and i was just stupid enough to think i could do it.
So i told my new girl that i had broke up with my friends mom but she wasn't taking me seriously. My friends mom some how convinced herself that there wasn't another woman an i just wanted to break up. She came over a few times under the guise of talking about the break up. I fucked her and guess who shows up. Yep my new girl who is an yeah you can guess it drunk. Soo My Friends Mom freaks out an i told my girl to leave so i could finish breaking up with her. My Friends Mom then realizing there is a another girl decides she doesn't care she just wants me to fuck her. I told her i didn't feel right about it. I really like my girl and i wasnt going to risk fucking it up.
MFM says NO i wont have it. I told her tough its over. She leaves but proceeds to send me over 250 text messages a day. seriously. I thought i could reason with her proceeded to try. she was pretty pissed but i felt she had come to terms.
4 days later she calls me an says we have to talk i told her i would speak with her but not at my house because i knew she would just try to fuck me. So we we meet in a parking lot in public. She tells me that she hired a private investigator to "do research" on my new girl then tells me that her "PI" has pictures of her leaving another mans apartment and all but fuckin him on the porch . I thought that is weird my girl was still married at the time but the pi didn't say anything about that. So i told MFM Send me the information the pi collected an the pictures to my email. Big mistake now she has my email.
MFM looked shocked, She figured at 1st hearing this news i would break off my relationship with my new girl. So yeah she emails me the CC of her and her "pi talking about the investigation. The pi had a gmail email and the content seemed to be written by the same person. So i asked for the pis number. The number she gave me always went straight to voice mail an the voice mail was always full. So i did reverse number look up on it, Yeah it was MFM dsl number that didn't accept incoming calls. That was the birth of who i now call "THE PSYCHO BITCH"
My friends mom now known as TPB was trying to fool me an get me break up with my girl so i called her out on it an told her i knew the number she gave me was hers.
I told her to stop calling me an that it was over.
TPB did not like that. she then called me all the time literally all day and night while i was at work an texted me every other minute. I asked her to stop told her If she didn't i would call her son an tell him that she wouldn't stop calling me. she went fuckin nutts screaming at me threatening to get me arrested. Threatened to have me beat up. You name it she went there.
I had no choice but to block her number. Because i could not do shit on my phone it was always getting text an calls. She filled up the memory in my phone with crazy shit
eventually she realized her number was blocked an started emailing me i have over 500 emails from her. lots of just weird stuff. She got my girls phone number an started calling her. Told her she was still fucking me an so on. Told her she was coming over to my house when she knew she wasn't there shit like that.
The most fucked up part of it was in her emails she tells me that she got pregnant with twins an aborted them both. Told me she was having sex with 3 other guys while she was fucking me. Told me one of them has herpes an I needed to get a std test. She tried demean me an insult me. Manipulative on the worst levels she was trying anything to get me to respond. Eventually i did 3 months after i blocked her number. I called her asking her to please stop texting my girl and to stop driving by my girls house. She said she would and that she wanted to meet me to apologies for how things went. I was stupid enough to believe her and agreed to meet. She meet me out side of my house when I got in the car she tried to tell me she never lied to me an the pi got the facts wrong an blah blah. I told her to stop the bullshit And That i was never going to fuck her again. She got quiet looked away an said i wish we could be frei... Then wham she hit me in the face closed handed i opened the door to get out an she took off tires screeching with me half way in the car. MY neighbor saw what happened and told me i needed to call the police so that if she tried to get me arrested for some fake bullshit i would have record of her acting crazy. Cops told me her real age 53 she said she was in her 40s
She was also sending me emails telling me what i had told her which was stop calling stop texting and stop sitting out side my house and driving by my girls house. She was pretty much stalking both of us in her spare time. I goggled she send those because its a he said she said type of thing her sending me the email was a way for her to cover her bases an pretend like i was stalking her.
I honestly moved on instantly an never thought about the The psycho bitch unless i was getting a email or a text. The phone company i use only lets me block numbers for 3 months Without fail when it relapsed i got more crazy text an had to block her again.
That was 2 years ago I am still with my new girl and i am very much in love with her. I have not talked with TPB or my friend since the craziness. She still sends me emails at least once a week with random cryptic comments meant to entice a reply
here is a couple of the emails i randomly selected
"Coming soon to a theater near you..."
"Ready to go downtown & 5th ward!
Not been there since that last time.
Odd, true & by choice.
Got goody bag filled with very interesting things...very.
As for the tomfoolery, hi jinks & Oscar- worthy performances by the entire cast...blah blah.
So vapid & inane.
Do not care.
Blah."
Downtown is code for me to fuck her in the ass.
"Sufficient time has passed to ensure no problems repeated.
Not gonna leave things negatively. Absolutely not.
Will contact for meet place, date & time.
No girlie histrionics. No tattling. No talking shit. Way way passed that.
5-10 minutes.
There are no memories of the heart or mind left.
Just unfinished business that will be completed.
Not gonna have negativity follow over & over.
Don't bother to pout about it.
No drama.
Get over yourself.
I have.
Blah
If left unfinished, it becomes crap-filled baggage to carry.
It's well known that what goes around come around.
I'm not havin it."
Anyone know how to get this crazy bitch to leave me alone its going over 2 years now.
She still send me emails wanting me to "meet with her"
Thanks for reading i hope some one can learn from my experience. Maybe even give me some advice.
I'm sure I'll get some crap for this, even though it's just a thought. Doesn't mean I'll ever act on it.
Anyhow, my confession is that I would really love to see a pretten girl with her legs spread wide, and actually masturbating. These random bits of girls posing is such a teaser, it drives me nuts
Yes...I'm a sick fuck...I know. whatever
Why all the anonymous posts? Make an account. Tell our little fucked up corner of the world what's up.
I'm a horrible person so I created an account to show off my fetishes, not all your info needs to be true. Just tell the admins the crap they need and go nuts. If it comes out in the end?! So what, yes I'll be the guy that jacks off to weird shit. Illl never tell and I hope you won't either.
I travel a lot for my job,I'm bi-sexual. I just enjoyed an hour of self abused anal torture, and now I want to cum.
Off I go into the wonderland of MOTHERLESS.COM
My stepdaughter is a whore,my son is a douch bag and I'm a freak. My wife acts like Martha fuckin Stewart with out the cash and jail time. 😂
That was funny and you know it!
FUCK IM OUT OF BEER!
Time to enjoy some motherless time.
Have fun people, our world is a stress filled shit box!
Jackoff, masterbate, fuck yourselves, fuck your neighbors, fuck each other.
Just tell us more, cause we are fucked up too!
Wow that's the longest post I've ever put up!
Fuck now I have to decide which category to post to!
I need a beer!
eternal damnation of the twisted mind; ok guys heres my confession, for as long as i can remember iv always wanted to feel normal, but i never have, no im not a gender bender or closet gay, but in my own diagnosis from endless research, i am a monster, the kind of things nightmares are made out of,and no i wasnt abused as a child, or have a domineering mother, i have no disability and i wasnt bullied at school, i wish and wish and pray to high heaven that my demons would subside, that i could be happy with a house a wife and kids, but that doesnt interest me at all , the thought of that makes me suicidal.the thought of working everyday for the rest of my life, abiding the law, laying down and taking crap, living by other peoples rules of right and wrong makes me physically sick. reason for my diagnosis...i dont think like normal people, i dont get disgusted at the horrific, studies on sphycotic serial killers reveal their inner windings, and i am 85 percent identical, it doesnt stop there, as long as i can remmeber iv been attracted to underage girls, not just pre-legal, pre puberty, i have sick, degrading and often voilent thoughts, the range of my fantasies goes from everything, from kids to beast to rape to degration even murder, yes thats right murder and i dont mean thinking bout it when i get pissed off i mean actually fantasising,rush of pleasure when thinking of choking someone, actually picturing a knife severing skin,planning down to a t the perfect murder and selected victims etc etc, the list could go on, i have planned my whole life, from the time i became aware of my condition i have portrayed a perfect "innocent" image of myself to others, minus a few rookie mistakes,everyday, for years and years. purely on the intention of if i ever act on my volcanic urges, that no one would suspect little old me, (you have to admit thats dedication to your art).now the awkward part...the 15 percent of me that craves normality. i have not yet acted on these impulses,the amount of times iv been ready to go on a spree that would garauntee to shock the world, i would litterally pray that i had a non-curable illness (see movie-saw)to then have an excuse to do what i want, the only thing that has stopped me from doing any of these things, my family, i couldnt bare them live with the shame of my name over their heads, my mother who is damn near a saint, my three lovely sisters, and my hard working father,it is because of them my enemies are safe to sleep at night, and the people of this world dont shudder at my name. god forbid if anything ever happens to them and i lose them, or they dissown me for whatever reason, then youll all know my name and this post will be the marking of my literary warped confession. being only 21 myself, there is plenty of time for this jekyl and hyde side of me to cease battling eeach other and show the world what were made of. untill then my friends, i leave you with one thought, is it better to die knowing you did everything u want but with a bad name, or to live a long life, and die an old unhappy man, filled with regrets, a wasted life. au revior
(Okay, fixed the issues, even though it shouldn't have been, hopefully no deletion this time)
So I have decided to finally share some of my exploits here after years of lurking.
This happened about 5 years ago when I was traveling the UK, and it will be a bit long and detailed (SKIP TO GOOD STUFF AT THE THE >>>> MARKS). I was traveling on a work holiday visa to the UK (right after finishing my University degree there) and had been living there about a year already. Worked at an ice cream shop casually for that year to make money so I could travel around the UK and Europe (before brexit fucked up the free shengen visa access). It was a great place to work with good pay. Not really too busy most of the time so I got to chill and relax in the back watching TV shows or playing games most of the time. Boss was totally chill and never around, he had other more important businesses to manage, so I had complete control of the place and he trusted me (nothing to really lose there either).
So this girl used to come around once in a while and we used to talk casually when she came in. She was a shy Indian girl, about 5'5'', nice slender body with thick thighs and at least C cup breasts. She was 19 when I first met her and was 20 by the time of this incident. I was 26 at the time and didn't really notice her sexually for the most part even though she was quite attractive and submissive sounding. I loved her accent obviously, being from the states, I welcome almost all European accents.
So overall we had a fairly good relationship and she would come in to talk more and more. The conversations would be lengthy as well since I had nothing to do. At this point I kind of wanted to have a go at her, but didn't have any opportunity to engage, since she was always shy and at a distance. Well, my break came in a tragic way, which as a sexual degenerate, I took full opportunity of. One day she comes in, kinda down and I ask her what was wrong? She tells me that one of her friends committed suicide, and right there and then my brain goes "jackpot". Before she could even go to the next part of the story I immediately started saying "OMG, I am so sorry that happened" (I didn't really care, I don't really deal with emotions). Got out from behind the counter, and before she had a chance to regroup, went in to give her a hug. I just approached her with a concerned look with arms slightly outstretched, saying, "Are you alright?". She kinda took the hint and reluctantly prepared for the hug which was just enough signal for the go ahead to me. Hugged her fairly tight and had my arms around her shoulders and pushed her head into my chest (in a consoling way). Then immediately pivoted to, "Lets go talk about this". Quickly moved to the door, locked it (no one comes in at this time anyway, and I didn't care). Then turned to her and put my hand around her small back to guide her to the back room.
These action were key to getting her comfortable with me physically because casual contact with chicks is how you break into the game, and shy chicks usually do not give you a chance. Couldn't believe my luck, because this chick had the body I like, cute accent, mannerisms and face, and submissive by what I could tell (JACKPOT). The age difference is what kept her and myself at range but I couldn't care less now.
So now we are in the back room. Sat her down on the couch next to me and turned slightly to her to "talk" about the incident. She had been in here with me before, but didn't sit next to me, just across on a chair. We used to come in there once in a while when we were talking for a while and I wanted to sit (no seating outside). Anyway, I was here to play the long(ish) game and so decided to "listen". Anyway, she said all sorts of stuff I do not remember, but every chance I got, I would go "Awww, that's so sad/tough/whatever" and hug her. Didn't wanna rush anything but still took my chances and crept my hand closer to her ass every time. By the end I just let me hand stay right at the junction of ass and back, while I listened to her. I decided not to do anything at this meeting, but the game was already on and from this point it was going to be easy.
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Anyway, the next few days she would come in, and I would not always greet her with a hug, and unlike before, this time my hands would apparently slide down from her mid back to small back during the hug. She was comfortable with that and being close all the time. We would talk in the back room and she would sit pretty close. Like 3 days after this all started, I decided to take my chances and steered the conversation to boyfriends and sex life. She obviously didn't have one because she was sheltered by parents and what not. She had had one boyfriend and they just made out if even that. She mentioned something about liking making out but hadn't done that in a while and I immediately went with the "Aww (insert some crap here)" routine and playfully said, "Here, I'll help you out". I went for it, and she took it hesitantly (they love confidence). At this point I just went in full french (in a slow romantic-ish way), and she went along (I could feel the discomfort and it just turned me on more). Put my hands down her waist and now on her hips. Made out like this for a couple more minutes and decided to leave her wanting more, so cut it short. She kind of giggled and I contemplated going in again, but decided to bide my time. Made some excuse about work and sent her on her her way.
Next two days, she would just come in and we would go to the back and make out. At this point she would sit, straddling, on top of me and I would fondle her ass and waist and back while we made out. I eventually turned her around on me kissing her from behind, and started feeling up her stomach and thighs (on the outside) and slowly crept up her chest until I was able to lightly caress her breasts in passing. Another day and I was fully fondling her tits over her clothes. The next day she was wearing a slightly low cut top and skirt, and the moment I saw that I knew this was going to be the day I could get it all (or most). The second we were making out I had my hands on her ass under the skirt. Feeling the skin on her ass felt amazing, I was hard as fuck and she probably could notice but didn't show it. I eventually turned her around and started kissing her from behind, feeling up her thighs. Then, slowly creeping up, started feeling up her chest and cleavage. Slowly started creeping into her shirt from the top, had my right hand and creeping down her left breast. As soon as my middle finger brushed her nipple she jumped a bit and put her left hand on my right. This is where I took real control and grabbed her left wrist with my left hand and firmly whispered "Relax" and resumed making out. Took her hand off mine, moving it firmly back to the side and cupped her right breast fully. Now I had one hand on her inner left thigh and the other playing with her tits. Both of her arms were to her side and I maintained a bit of pressure from my arms to hold them there while I felt her up. Made out more forcefully too and she completely submitted. After a while, wrapped it up, got her ready to leave. Before she left, I told her to "wear a skirt and blouse tomorrow" with a serious look, kissed her and sent her home.
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Next day she came in, wearing a skirt and blouse and I didn't waste time getting to work. This time, just lifted her blouse above her tits, pulled the bra down and started playing openly (she was kinda stiff, and so was I). Then, still exposed, turned her around and started making out with her facing me. Put my hands on her ass and almost right away got under her panties. She kinda squirmed but I just pulled her in to assert myself. Squeezed her ass cheeks for a bit and then just brushed my middle finger against her asshole. This made her shudder and I took that to mean "GO TIME". Started rubbing her asshole with my middle finger and moved my other hand to her pussy from behind and started gently rubbing her VERY wet cunt. Then swapped hands to rub her asshole with her pussy juice, so I could be a bit more forceful. Had one finger slowly rubbing and even went in slightly. Pulled her panties down so they were out of the way. She was squirming the whole time which almost made me jizz, so good. At this point, I pull her back a bit, and said "Hey, I need you to do something for me". Still with her tits out and panties down, knelt her down in front of me (she knew what was coming). Pulled my dick out swiftly, turned her head up (she was focused on the dick), looked her in the eyes and said "Suck me", and then forced her head down towards my cock. I could kinda feel the resistance and hesitation, which made me even harder. Slowly moved her mouth to my cock and slid the head into her lips (FRICKIN AMAZING, couldn't believe everything was moving as swiftly as it had). Told her to lick the top and get it wet. Slowly started thrusting deeper in until she started to gag a bit half way down. That was her limit for now and so used that as a marker to move her head up and down to that point, pushing a bit lower occasionally. At this point I could get myself to come using her head so decided to keep her going. Took one of her hands and put them on my balls, told her to "Massage me a bit", which she kinda just moved up back and forth (good enough for now). After a few minutes, decided to stop holding back and picked up the pace. Stood up and started moving more freely. As I approached my climax, I pulled her off my dick, turned her head to me, looked into her eyes and said "I am going to cum in your mouth, it will be cleaner that way". She kind of nodded and so I resumed fucking her mouth. I could now feel the tingling in my balls, had a huge smile on my face as I approached the point. Started getting faster and faster and then started EXPLODING in her mouth. Honestly felt like a good 8 or 9 spurts before I came down. She had her eyes closed tight and was focusing on what was happening in her mouth. Slowly pulled out of her mouth and saw her swallow it (BONUS). Turned her head up to meet my gaze, smiled down warmly at her, said "Thank you, that was great" and kissed her lightly on the forehead. Could tell she was kinda still catching up to what happened, so moved things along. Got her on her feet, told her to go "freshen up" in the bathroom. She came out after a few minutes, and I sat her down, lightly made out (they like to cuddle after or something) and then sent her on her way.
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Next day she came in wearing yoga pants and a t-shirt, which got me hard right away. The fact that she was coming in so often now just signaled to me that all was well and I can now have my way with her. Now, since she was fairly new to all this, I decided to start doing all the weird shit I liked first, to make it seem like it was all normal. She was far less experienced and wouldn't question anything hopefully. Took her to the back, started making out while still standing. Peeled her pants and panties down and started playing with her ass. At this point I decided to go much further just because why not. Told her to take her pants off completely, which she reluctantly did. Then started making out with her and just pulled her top right off. Then took her bra off and she was making out completely naked with me (while I was fully clothed). The disparity was HOT as fuck and I could tell she wasn't comfortable at all with this. So I decided to make things even more uncomfortable. Guided her to the couch, get her on all fours on the couch and then pushed her head all the way down while putting pressure on her back to make her arch. Perfect head down ass up position and then told her "don't move". With the lights on, I had a beautiful view of her pussy and asshole, it was all I could do to hold back from just pulling my dick out and shoving in all the way. Started playing with her ass and pussy. She was visibly dripping down her legs. Kept telling her how went she was, and she would just quietly whimper and moan. At this point, I decided to start fingering her pussy and ass. Slowly slid a middle finger in each and started working them in and out. Slowly pulled the finger out of her ass and took it to the next level. Told her this finger wasn't wet enough and told her to open her mouth. She did just as she was ordered and I swiftly put the finger in her mouth and started rubbing it over her tongue. Making her go ass to mouth here would set me up for all my favorite shenanigans later. She took it like a champ, told her to spit on my finger and make it wet, which she did. Then started working her ass again, occasionally pulling out to "wet" the finger again. A few minutes more of this and I decided to make her cum. Started working her clit and pussy and within seconds she started shuddering and then fully vibrating for a good 10 seconds. Honestly hadn't seen an orgasm that intense, and she sounded like she was using all her power to suppress violently moaning out. After her orgasm subsided, she did her best to maintain her posture but couldn't so I let her collapse. Sat down next to her head and slowly caressed her asking her "How was that?". She didn't really answer but nodded slightly and was just catching her breath.
After a few minutes of rest, it was my turn. Just pulled my pants off, whipped out my dick and moved her into position. Told her to suck me off and she started to slowly do that. BUT NOW, it was time to get to my favorite part. I love me some rimjobs, always have, always will. I have been able to get every girl I have been with to lick my ass whether they wanted to or not. Most do not even say no if you are assertive enough. The best is to do it when in the heat of the act and they just do it cause there isn't any time to think about it. This time though, I basically wanted her to know what I was making her do. It's hotter when I know they are aware of the fact that I am going to make them lick my ass (its not a glamorous place to be). While she was slowly sucking me, I pulled her off my dick and guided her to my balls while looking in her eyes. Told her to "Lick my balls" in a firm manner and she complied. Let her do that for a bit to normalize that. Then slowly started pushing her head lower while raising my legs. Told her "lick me under the balls, lower down" as I slowly guided her head over my taint (this is also THE BEST, very close second to full on rimjob). I let her lick there for a bit while I slowly raised my legs. At this point I had her face firmly against my taint where she was licking as told. This felt amazing but I had to move to the best yet. Slowly started pushing her head down (and she started resisting knowing what she was approaching). Said "OH yea, that feels great, lick my asshole" with some urgency and firmness. At this point, I pushed her head lower and her tongue started licking at my asshole. Started letting her know "OH shit, that feels great, keep going". Now I let go of her head to see what would happen, she licked a bit and started wandering higher. I FIRMLY pushed her head back down and told her "keep licking my asshole, don't stop until I tell you". I started jacking off and edging myself while she kept licking. I could feel how uncomfortable she was, and knowing she was still doing it made it SUPER HOT. Didn't really want that to end but all good things do, so had to start wrapping up. Started jacking off faster and as I approached orgasm, I pushed her back, stood up, told her I was going to come, told her to open her mouth, shoved my cock in and exploded even harder than last time. She was visibly choking on the cum trying to swallow it (it must have shot straight to the back, always gets them by surprise). Finished cumming and pumped her mouth for a bit to enjoy the feeling. Pulled her head off my dick, took this opportunity to degrade her a bit more by wiping my cock clean on her cheeks. Looked into her eyes and told her "That was amazing, you're the best". She smiled shyly and I sent her to get cleaned up. Did the whole "cuddle" routine after and sent her on her way. BEST DAY EVER so far, decided to plan out the next day and how I would approach fucking her.
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Out of time now, will come back to add the rest.
*i posted this a while ago...but found that i couldn't respond to any of the comments. thought maybe it was because i didn't have an account. i have now remedied that;)
Someone commented that the post: Is a fake. It's a dude. Or some such crap. I assure you. I'm very much female...and terribly cute ;)
~~~~~
i confess.
i had a dream last night. similar to one i had about my big brother involving camping, a tent and him fingerfucking me. hawt!!!!
i think i was maybe 19-20. i was at my parents' house. my mom had gone out on an errand. i was drinking a glass of red wine and sitting with my dad. talk turned to topics somewhat salacious. i can't remember exactly what. i remember feeling turned on...and feeling guilty. kinda looking around to see if anyone was around and heard us. i sort of lean back in my chair and have my legs a little open.
all of a sudden he stands up and in two quick strides he’s standing over me. He pushes my legs further open and shoves his fingers in me and starts finger fucking me roughly. i'm out of my freakin head. i knew i wasn’t supposed to like it. i knew i “should” be objecting—telling him to stop--but i was so fucking turned on. i wanted it. i couldn’t get enough. i wanted more. i was so proud of being my daddy’s little girl. i want him to do it harder and faster. he grabs one of my titties and roughly pulls on it.
then we hear a door open and close. and we both separate quickly. and try to act normal.
i 'wake' up and i start jerking madly to the idea of it all...my pussy starts to ache almost painfully as my pussy is screaming for release. only then do i *actually* really wake as my hand is jerking in mid air. i'd only been dreaming of jerking to it all. this happens again. my pussy aching and screaming for release...only to find my hand is jerking in air above my head.
then. before i fully come awake--in the haze of the dream state--before the committee in my head can put the kabosh on it all...i jerk off madly to thoughts of my dad mercilessly finger-fucking me.
i’m such a good girl ;)
i'm twitching and wet as i type this. gonna jerk off to the idea of my brother doing it to me...
Good guys?! Really ladies, you want a 'good guy' huh?! The thing is you've most likely had at least one 'good guy' in your life but YOU probably thought he was 'just a friend' or too lame, too short, didn't make enough cash or didn't dress right for you to be serious about him. . .You probably even joked with your friends about how he fawned over you like a little puppy dog. . .so now that your relationship with the cool looking, rich douchebag is over you're out here wondering where all the 'good guys' are simply because YOU chose to date an asshole!! The good guys aren't stupid. . .they see the kind of guys who get women like you so they start acting like more of an asshole themselves and VOILA. . .they start scoring pussy. . .and in a way YOUR rejection of 'good guys' is to thank for that!
There is another possibility of course. . .you don't really want a 'nice guy' but feel the social pressure to at least APPEAR to have matured beyond your infantile taste in men. . .after all, 9th grade was a long time ago ladies!! If only you were 5 years younger!
So please STOP misrepresenting what you REALLY want and own up to the fact that you've screwed yourselves over. . .it's time to excise the bullshit and deal with reality ladies. . .you didn't want a nice guy then and he certainly doesn't want you now!
But yeah, sorry that it took the absence of 'nice guys' for you to notice that you missed them or wanted one!!
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RE: GOOD GUYS
Well said.
You should see what these disillusioned cunts post on their dating profiles. I think it is a subconscious desire to never find anyone. It's like a list of everything their ex's were not. Imagine a guy putting in his dating profile - "If you wear sweat pants it's a deal breaker".
Fuck it ladies --- I will jerk off to porn rather than put up with your selective crap. It's stress free. Oh and all of you mid forty-ish bitches -- Yup, look for them dudes "30 to 40" -- so when he's tired of your old ass he puts in for a fresh one. By the time you realize what's going on, you'll be in your fifties and OOPs/ "gee, I'm not a milf anymore".
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RE: GOOD GUYS
I agree totally. I've been one of the good guys my whole life and these selfish cunts have broken my heart repeatedly. Men are far more sensitive and loyal..it is just this feminist cunt society that tries to pass them off as being so special...when they are in fact little more than life support systems for their vaginas. They have no real friendship to offer because they are self centered and unable to let go of their sense of entitlement. The only ones worth anything are the ones who will let you shove your cock down their throats on command, but afterwards you still have to deal with a fucking idiot. I too would much rather save my money and piece of mind and jerk off to porn. There is incredible shit being done to women in porn these days and I can usually bust my nut in under 5 minutes and get on to the things that matter. Every now and again I'll get a young escort and really abuse the shit out of her...and when she leaves looking baffled as to why I so completely treated her like shit..well...that is priceless :) 40 somethings and their pathetic dating profiles...so fucking stupid that they actually think they have something to offer...what a fucking joke.
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RE: GOOD GUYS
I can tell you one thing ... down south, those women know how to treat a man. As long as you don't stray, they will stay loyal, cook for you, clean ... real women. Not all of course.. they got their sweat hog low lifes too .. but for the most part, southern women rock !
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RE: GOOD GUYS
Control my life ? ... nah.
Ranting and raving --- it's the page you are reading.
Doing anything I want, whenever I want. It's great. I threw the control out years ago.
A FEW bad experiences, you say ? No ....rather, more than enough to push my patience.
Here's an idea -- all of those nifty memes you worked so hard on copy and pasting -- make up some originals. I'm a firm believer in working at something you love. Memes are def your calling.
Work at something you love and retire early, like I did. It's absolutely great (well, after I threw out the control).
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Ok it's been getting kind of sad how many guys are girls on here acting like they are girls. people need to be honest with themselves. seriously if you cant get a girl to talk to you then wait. its not about rushing into a chat and getting your dick hard. and i can tell when a guy is a girl they leave randomly for a day or 2 or they just dont talk to you for a few days. others will say they dont have a cam which could be true if they weren't behind a camera lying. i hate liars i have a webcam i just dont use it for this. i use it for chatting with my family and crap and i dont want hundreds of guys staring at me. i aint some piece of eye candy for everyone to stare at and masturbate to. i dont mind if you do it with my pics but im not gonna get on cam and get 100 messages saying "TAKE OFF YOUR TOP!" or "STRIP ON CAM" fuck that. so guys stop faking that girlish shit it gets annoying. and i'm willing to wager the real GIRLS behind the cam feel the same way. now i know your thinking "Why dont you put your camera on private?" why so i can get 1000 invites? no. listen. if your a girl with a cam don't be shy. and if you don't want to put your cam on then im ok with it. from 1 girl to another. don't be shy or afraid. but guys dont fucking lie and say your a girl with no webcam when you have one your just afraid of showing your liar face. Now i wont put my name on here. but i will put my Alias on here.
~Star~
I have a crush on my professor.
It's not what you'd probably think, I think anyways -- this is a community college, she's a youngish (I don't know, she's probably mid-thirties; I'm twenty-two) adjunct, and she seems to not really give a crap about whether or not something is inappropriate between a teacher and student (she gave one of her students a hug, after she gave her a gift of some sort). We've chatted a bit outside of class. She seems like a really sweet person, though that could just be a persona for her students, and she's cute.
I feel like I love her. I'm hurting a bit right now because I randomly started thinking about her. But, aside from the age difference, and how busy she is, there's two problems.
First off, while I feel like I love her, I don't really want anything to do with her. Even though I'm trying to ask her out, on an impulse, I don't actually like the idea of dating. I don't really want to fuck her either. I have these impulses toward her, but they don't actually translate into conscious attraction. Consciously I feel I should just forget about her after the semester ends in a week, but I don't want to forget about her.
Second, I feel like I've fucked up. I've had two classes with her, and in both I've made my crush kind of apparent. I act like a sad puppy in need of attention. I'm nice to her all the time -- jumping to help her and whatnot. And I haven't really given her any reason to make her think I'm a mature adult. It's hard to explain and people tell me I'm being too hard on myself.
This is part an attempt to get it off my chest, part a call for advice.
Where are all the good rape vids at? There used to be a couple on here that looked like the real deal. Maybe not like an off the street thing more like some dumb bitch owed her pimp some money and got hurt for it.
Usually they looked like they were Russian or East European.
I am sick of the fakey crap. Like the Japanese on the Subway. Yeah right. There was a good one where some nigger pushes his way into some ritzy white chicks place and pulls a gun. Really believable and then she giggles half way through and says hows my acting. Why the fuck do they always have to ruin a good vid?
I confess that confessions used to be decent and over the past several months (or years, depending on how you look at it) it has devolved into a series of lame fantasy stories written by a bunch of illiterate assholes. My examples below sum up the major types of "confessions" being written and my response to them:
1.I'm an underage girl/boy sexually attracted (or having sexual relations) with my father/mother/cousin/brother/sister...
Shut the fuck up. No you're not.
2. I'm a mother/father who wants to teach my children/stepchildren about sex by actually performing a sexual act with them; or I just want to have sex with them.
Shut the fuck up. No you're not.
3. I just fucked my first dog.
Shut the fuck up. No you didn't.
I know that these situations can and do actually occur in real life and that some of these confessions are legit, but the vast majority of the crap on here is clearly written by a bunch a liars. What I hate the most is that really good confessions get lost in a sea of bullshit and they are getting hard to find.
This used to be a place where I could relate to others that have a dark side in their secret life. Now, mostly I see a bunch of preppy posers that think it's cool to pretend to be something that they are not. It's exactly analogous to how kids shop at Hot Topic to appear goth.
So, I implore that people stop writing if you don't actually have a real confession and just enjoy reading those that actually do.
There are approximately a dozen or so of you that write story after story of bullshit. If you were actually good writers, then you would be aware of the fact that everybody has a distinct style of writing much like the fingerprints on your hands. It is unmistakable. Just stop, please. I know you won't. I know when sites become like this, they are doomed for life and all the legit people disappear one by one. I'm just so fucking pissed about it this time because there isn't really any better alternative. They've all been overrun; most worse than motherless.
Nude Vista Content
Holy Crap, Did My Neighbors Catch Me In The Act? I Was Making Quite A Ruckus!
