When I was 19 years old and in college in Florida, I got really heavy into drugs. Mainly party drugs like coke and ecstasy, and of course plenty of weed, but on occasion other drugs as well. I was out of control and living one big party life on my parent's dime while they struggled mightily to pay for me to have the opportunity they never had and go to college. Looking back I feel like a total asshole about it now as they wanted nothing more than for me to be successful and not have to struggle...sorry, I digressed.

Anyway, since I had no money and wanted to keep up my partying lifestyle and since I was always very athletic, in shape and considered "good-looking", through one of the people I met in the party scene I ended up doing some modeling to make some extra money. Pretty low rent stuff, nothing glamorous, but a couple hundred bucks a week.

This quickly evolved into the opportunity to do some "videos". It started with just masturbation videos of me lying in bed, or on a couch or in the shower jerking off. I figured I was going to do it anyway so why not get paid for it and I was getting paid $100-200 per day that I did a shoot. I could sometimes do 3 or 4 scenes in a day. The guy running the operation said he was impressed by my "re-load" ability and also that I had just the right cock for it...I'm about 8 inches, decently thick and my dick looks perfectly formed from shaft to head and can blow pretty big loads even after only a little break in between. I knew that these were primarily for gay guys to watch but I didn't care. If someone gets off from seeing me, so fucking what. I did these for a while and then he asked one day if I'd want to do some full sex movies and photo shoots and showed me some of his portfolio and all things considered the chicks looked pretty hot and we were now talking more like $300-500 per day so I jumped right at the chance.

It was a crazy scene and pretty much everything you wanted was at your fingertips. Women and drugs galore. Parties every night after shooting. We were all in the 18-22 age bracket so it was just a no responsibility show. But as quickly as I made money it went back out the door on drugs and partying. Then one night when we were partying at the main house this director used for shooting videos, him and a couple of the other "big wigs" in their operation asked me if I would be willing to do some more hardcore shit. At first I was thinking they meant bondage, s&m type stuff, but they quickly made it clear they were talking gay action. I immediately said not a chance, I was straight and no way I could do it. They pushed the matter (and a coffee table with a big pile of blow on it) and said that all the actors in their gay shoots are straight guys because that is the look they wanted in their videos, strong masculine men, not femboys. The guys just do "gay for pay" and they also said I could make up to a $1000 per shoot depending on the circumstances. At that point my eyes lit up and I think they knew they had me. I asked them more questions and they said I could be strictly a top and receive blow jobs, that I didn't have to get fucked or suck or kiss anyone if I didn't want to. I could also do bi scenes where a female actress or two would be involved. I said, what the fuck, let's give it a try.

The next week they had scheduled me in for my first scene. I was shaking like a leaf prior to which was totally not like me. In the other stuff I had already done I was totally calm and had no issues getting naked, getting hard and fucking in front of other people. It was a one on one scene with me and another guy. I was going to be swimming naked in the pool and then get out and immediately go to the lounge chair next to the pool when the "pool guy" was going to show up to service the pool and eventually me who was masturbating while watching him clean the pool. I actually was having a difficult time getting hard which was totally not the norm for me, but he came over and began blowing me for a while and soon enough I did get fully hard. I had sunglasses on and just kept my eyes closed and picturing hot women. I put on a condom and ended up fucking him in a few different positions and then to my surprise he end up blowing his load on my chest as he was riding me, then slid off my cock, dropped back down and sucked me to completion taking my load all over his face.

I said afterward that it wasn't that bad, but I didn't think I wanted to do it again...until I got my next offer and more cash. It went on like this for a while and me just doing the fucking and getting sucked. I still was primarily doing straight shoots though. Then the director came to me with a proposal for a scene. It would be me and this girl I had done some straight scenes with and we would be a "married" couple and then another guy who was coming to our house to do some repairs. But he wanted it to be a scene where me and her completely serviced this guy. We all were going to suck and fuck each other, no holds barred type stuff. I was extremely hesitant but he offered up my biggest payday yet and it was a good chunk of money for 4-5 hours of total "work". I was so far gone into the scene at that time that I agreed and said let's do this.

The day came and again I was nervous. I did all my usual prep on my "manscaping" and where I normally do everything I can to keep myself fresh down below, this time I added the step of the diet one of the other male actors recommended and his full enema routine to completely clean me out. The worst thing on a porn set when anal is involved is having a shit accident. It came time for the scene and we were in the bedroom on a king size bed where I was fucking the girl for a while then the "repair" man came in, he joined in with me "thinking" he was just going to play jointly with my wife but then he starts licking my balls and ass and pulling out my cock from the wife's pussy and sucking on it. We go through some more motions and she is sucking him then she tells me she wants to see me suck him and this is it, the moment I took a cock in my mouth. I did what I had to do and then after he fucks her it was my turn to take his cock. I was laying on my back as she sat on my face and then he started fucking my ass. Hurt like hell but I had to put up a good front. He even made a comment that got into the video about how tight my ass was. Anyway, we finished the scene after everyone had been fucked and sucked and I went out that night with some of the other people from set and we got destroyed on drugs and booze. I was fucked up beyond belief and when I got home that night I said that was it, I was done. Absolutely no more of all of it. The drugs the porn, nothing. The next day I called up the director and said to pull me from the stuff he had me scheduled for the next week. He tried to convince me and told me what a fucking amazing job I had done the day before, but I told him I had to get out. I couldn't handle the life and really was regretting all of it. I pulled the plug that day and never looked back.

So, somehow through all of this I didn't flunk out of school. I ended up completing my degree and living out a pretty mundane, boring college life and working a bullshit part-time job in one of the offices on campus answering phones and shit. Really nobody in my "normal" life had any clue about what I had done. My parents were none the wiser about anything I did partying or whatever and were proud as could be the day they saw me get my degree. I started a job with a top consulting firm and in the decade plus since, have worked hard and progressed so much in my career that I look at the "crazy" money I was making from porn and laugh at how little it is compared to now. I am engaged to a very attractive and smart girl who is an attorney and makes plenty of money herself, but also has no clue about my prior life.

I guess my biggest fear is that one day I am going to come on here and see one of my videos front and center. I know they are out there in various places on the web, but they obviously weren't under my real name and the look I had back then was very different than it is now where I am clean cut hair, have a beard, and even back then in a bunch of the scenes I had bleached blonde hair for a while and a deep Floridian tan. I guess my real name and SSN is on file with the porn company somewhere so that could somehow get out, but generally speaking I got away free and clear without any repercussions. Crazy the journey our lives take.

I cannot deny her. All she said to me upon coming home from work was “ASHTRAY NOW! ” in an affirmative tone. Yes GODDESS, I responded. I hurriedly took to the bedroom, stripped and started filling my condom with cigarette butts separated from the filters, and ashes. Then I bent over and spread my ass to open my hole. There were 5 half smoked cigarettes on a plate. I knew what they were for. She loves shoving them in my ass! The menthol burns, as she pours the glass full of her piss after I place myself on the bed. The cigarettes in my ass soak up her piss and immediately react with the menthol making my hole burn and throb. With my condom encasing my little dick and balls she tells me “only gay porn, and today it will be gay scat porn only” she starts to exit the bedroom and turns and says let’s have a smoke first. She uses my mouth as her ashtray and rubs ashes from a container she saves for these occasions into my tits and body as she smokes. I’m already leaking precum in my ashtray filled condom and she tugs it and brings the tobacco into my little dick. She finishes her cigarette and says I’ve got three hours to edge. “Hold the cigarettes in your sissy ass for as long as you can” and “I expect you to stroke the whole time”. “I’ll be back when I want another smoke sissy” she exits the bedroom and I start stroking the dry tobacco and butts in my condom fringing my sissy dick raw. After pissing the menthol tobacco really starts to burn! It’s uncomfortable and humiliating as well as degrading but when she tells me she gets off on humiliating me and she sits out on the couch getting herself off I cannot resist being her sissy faggot ashtray. She never wants to fuck, she gets off degrading me. It’s really a special occasion if she masturbates in front of me as she flicks her ashes in my mouth or puts her cigarettes out on my dick (she cums so hard as she tamps out her cigarette on my little sissy dick). I just confess I cannot deny her her power and control that gets her off. I wonder every day what could be next for me. 

Being 25yo and a kissless virgin was no fun at all, so when a guy friend of mine confessed to me he was gay I also confessed to him I was sort of interested in guys too, at least sexually. He wasted no time and asked me if I wanted to mess around with him. We kissed, blew each other and enjoyed ourselves. I liked it a lot at first mainly because doing that was a way for me to vent any sexual urges, but after the thrills at the start I realized I didn't enjoy him kissing me, or doing other weird sexual habits of his. Despite me saying to him I actually didn't enjoy some things, he kept doing them and when I didn't tell him to stop a second time he'd say "see? you like it after all".

Before all this we'd usually hang out watching dumb movies, youtube videos and catch up since we don't see each other too often. However after we started going sexual that was all he had in mind when he met. We'd sit on the couch watching a movie and he'd keep fondling me, I had to shove him away many times since he kept doing it again and again.I had to make up excuses for not letting him suck me off or not having me suck him off, but that never stopped him form insisting every time. Only once he actually walked away, not before putting me in a vulnerable position in bed to try and arouse me.

I'm at a point where I don't know what to do. I obviously want to keep him as a friend, but I don't want to keep having "benefits". I've already raised the topic once with him but he still keeps pressuring me into sex. I'm not sure if it's sex with him, sex with men, or even sex in general what puts me off, since I have no other frame of reference, but it's something that I seriously don't know how to handle and want to get off my chest.

I confess that last night after my girlfriend went to bed, I began jerking to some porn to relieve some much needed tension. When I masturbate I get tons of exotic ideas in my head such as woman on woman, man on man, man on trans and I get tons of fetishes like swallowing huge loads, cream pies, or gang bangs.

This kinda night I was feeling a little 'gay' to be blunt. I was strolling through CL trying to pick up a guy for a quick car blowing, but it was 4AM and I wasn't getting any biters. I never done anything homoerotic before, but was always curious to see what it was like. Without any luck, I came across a porn section called CEI. The girls in the videos looked cute, but I didn't like the humiliation scenes. I finally found a vid where a girl was talking about CEI and wasn't in a demanding or degrading manner. I laid down in front of my couch, lifted my legs up so my feet were passed my head. Sitting there stroking all 7" of my manhood and wanting the little swimmers to spray all over my face. Right before I came, I had a naughty thought pass through my head and said fuck it!! I opened my mouth wide as my dick was only an inch away from my eager tongue. I stroked to the video and when she told me to cum, I did. All in my mouth and on the front of my chin, down to my neck and upper chest. It was more liquid than cream, and without hesitation took a big gulp of the half-shot of warm seed in my mouth. I have been eating a lot of fruit and have been on a healthy diet the past month. To my surprise it tasted sweet. I used my hands to grab what was left on my chin, went to clean up, and laid there in bed with my girlfriend. Maybe tonight I will get her to swallow and we can share?

I've just turned 50 and with that age bracket - there comes problems, the main ones being an enlarged prostate and erectile disfunction. I've got some Cialis and sometimes I wonder if a lot of the ED isn't psychological. My wife and I have been in an open marriage for a few years, she's bisexual and I love the fringe benefits of it. One night she went to a bar and brought back a very attractive female, who was about 45 years old (same age as my wife).
They were both tipsy, and my wife introduced me to Jessie, raven haired, medium sized tits and a nice tight body. They sat down on the couch and invited me over. Small chit chat ensued. My wife poured her some wine, and she drank some too - I refused because I knew that just in case I was going to get lucky, drinking wine would screw with my ED. I stepped away for a minute and went into the bedroom and took a Cialis, got a drink of water and chugged it. I went back into the living room where they were sitting and they were making out. Jessie noticed me, and stopped kissing my wife.
"Oh, I'm sorry I thought you were going into the other room to give us privacy..."
My heart sunk, looks like I wasn't going to be sticking my dick into Jessie tonight.
"My bad," I said, looking down - defeated.
My wife saw that I was a bit hurt and explained, "Jessie is a lesbian, she isn't into men... she doesn't mean any disrespect..."
I should really give them their privacy, I thought...
"Ok, cool - I'm going out."
So I got in my car and drove around, no destination - but then I thought about it, I just took a Cialis. Pretty soon my cock would be begging for some wet hole to fuck. I guess I could get sloppy seconds once my wife is done with Jessie... but that could be a while, so I decided to go to an adult bookstore a few miles from my house. Weird shit popped into my mind, "Maybe there's a hot chick I could fuck in a glory hole, I've never done that... or maybe I can get an escort or hooker..."
All kinds of shit was going through my mind. This bookstore is a 24 hour store, so I went in and it was busy as fuck. All I wanted to do was ask the guy behind the counter where to find a lady of the evening, but too many people were around him. I noticed two women looking at toys and giggling, the looked like they were in their mid 20s, so I tried to blend in and started looking at masturbators. The small version of the Fleshlight was 79$?! I was taken aback and shaking my head. I was trying to maintain the "no eye contact" creed while I browsed all kinds of toys. I stopped in front of the 'prostate massager' section, all shapes and sizes - I never had a massager or anything anal but I heard of the wonders of prostate massages. Too bad my wife and her new friend were fucking around or I'd definitely try to experience something like that. I heard a little whisper behind me, something like "you ask him..."
I turned around and it was the giggling ladies. One was a brunette with very dark brown eyes, the other woman had purple and white streaks in her hair, but had cool blue eyes. Both were very attractive.
"Hmm? What's up ladies? I asked.
They blushed, "ummm, are you gay? No offense if you are... we're just wondering about the prostate massagers..."
I blushed, "OH, NO NO! I'm not gay, I'm straight..." so I did something that I never did with a stranger, I opened up, "I have ED, and I've done some reading and some people say these things help. I just turned 50 a few days ago, and my wife is at home banging her girlfriend and I'm just here... browsing because - well I just took a damn Cialis and ... well that's that. Sorry if it's too much information... I'm not a creep or anything."
The brunette smirked, "You don't look 50 at all, I thought you were about 35 or 40 at most."
Purple haired girl nudged her friend, "he's cute for a 50 year old..."
They both giggled and blushed. I didn't know what to say, this was odd because I've never talked to anyone in any adult bookstore given the exception of the checkout clerk. They saw I was struggling too, and the purple haired one spoke up.
"So you let your wife bang other women? That's kinda hot... I just broke up with my boyfriend, and Amanda just doesn't like dating at all so we're both kinda of single but we keep each other company if you know what I mean?"
My dick twitched.
"I'm Mike," I said, extending a hand out to the purple haired girl. She took it, and replied, "I'm Mary and this is Amanda, nice to meet you Mike."
Amanda's face was turning a bit red, "Mike, since you don't have anything else to do, you want to join us for some coffee? There is a cafe just down the street!"
I agreed, and started walking towards the door when Mary said, "Mike, aren't you forgetting something?" while pointing to the prostate massager.
I picked up the smaller one, $45... and headed for the check out. I paid for it and the clerk put it in a black bag. I turned around and Amanda and Mary were gone. Well there goes that. I left the store and walked to my car.
"Mike!" I heard a call from a distance, it was Amanda waving from across the parking lot.
"Oh I thought you both bugged out," I laughed.
She took me by the arm, "oh hell no, and miss the chance to hang out with a sexy 50 year old with ED??"
We both laughed. Mary, Amanda and me walked down the street arm in arm to a cafe. We sat down and talked for what seemed to be hours. These two women were not only attractive, but smart as hell too. I asked how old they were.
Amanda spoke first, "I'm 23, just turned 23 in January."
"I'm 26," Mary said sipping her coffee.
I laughed, "you're both half my age!"
"Older men are sexy, our generation likes older men. You guys know what you want and you're not complete idiots, or assholes," Amanda said.
Again, my dick twitched.
Mary looked me in the eyes, "we're freaks in the sheets, Mike."
I couldn't help myself, "is that an invitation?"
Amanda put her hand on my knee, "why would two girls in their 20's be hanging out at a bookstore at night unless they had an agenda? You were the first decent guy that came in there and we were in there for a while..."
My heart started racing.
"We're gonna put your little toy to the test, if you let us..."
I was in for an adventure of a lifetime.
We went back and got in my car, I drove them to Mary's apartment, and we all went inside. There really wasn't any wasting time. They stripped me down as soon as the door was shut. My cock was in Amanda's mouth as Mary's tongue probed my throat. My hands wandered from Mary's sexy tits, down to her dripping wet pussy. My cock was rock hard as Amanda shoved it all the way in her mouth to the hilt. I'll admit, I don't have a huge cock, I'm just normal - but the way she was sucking my dick put me on top of the world. They led me to the bedroom and Amanda pushed me down on the bed. Mary unwrapped the prostate massager and started playing with it using her pussy. She let it slip inside her.
I got kind of worried, I never had anything going up my ass before... so my erection started going down.
"Oh, baby - nothing to worry about - just relax..." Mary said.
Amanda climbed on top of my face and I started licking her pussy, she smelled really good, and her pussy tasted sweet. Amanda started moaning and I grabbed on to her nice soft ass to steady her.
I felt Mary playing with my cock, pumping it with her hand, then I felt her mouth around it and I was hard again. As Amanda rod my face, Mary mounted my hard dick and I felt how tight she was. I moaned as her pussy stroked me up and down.
Amanda came hard on my face, squirting a little - but I didn't mind at all. I held her against my mouth until she almost passed out.
Amanda crawled off to the side, and shivered. I could see Mary in all of her glory, bouncing on my cock, smiling. Her nails sunk into my chest as she rode me, moaning. Amanda got up and started fingering Mary's clit and licking her tits as she rode me. Soon Mary came hard, and I could feel her warm pussy juices dripping onto my balls.
"Your turn," Amanda said to me as she grabbed the prostate massager and rubbed it on her pussy.
"We gotta get it nice and wet Mr. Mike..."
Mary spit on her fingers and started rubbing my asshole and Amanda slowly pushed the pussy juice soaked massager in. I moaned in pain, that shit hurt...
"It's ok Mike, we're going to go slow..." and they did.
Mary started sucking on my cock as Amanda slowly used the toy on me. I tried my best to relax. I was trying to focus past the pain... it took a while but Amanda started hitting something that felt so good.
"That's it Mike, relax... we're going to drain those balls..." Amanda said, pushing the toy in, and pulling it slightly out. She started going faster, and then faster as Mary moved her mouth up and down on my pulsating cock.
"Give us all that cum babe, come on..."
I had these two young women fucking the shit out of me... and I felt this weird feeling starting to erupt around my entire body, like all of my nerves were electrified (but in a good way). Suddenly my cock erupted as Mary stopped sucking both of them literally started making out as cum exploded on their tongues and faces. They moaned, they licked my cock and more cum sprayed out. Mary deep throated me, then Amanda did. Then they kissed deeply. I was on the verge of passing out.
"Did you like that, Mike?"
"HOLY FUCK LADIES" I gasped.
They both laughed. They took the massager out of me and put it in a bag.
"I'm going to give you my number, I really hope you call me... I wouldn't mind having more adventures with you..."
"Did you think this was a one time deal old man??" Mary joked.
"You can spend the night with us if you want... no strings, just chill and cuddle and sleep..."
Amanda lit a joint and took a small hit, passing it to me. I took a hit, held it in and let it go as I passed the joint to Mary.
"I'd love to spend the night," I said as we all laid in the bed together.
When I woke up in the morning, both of these babes were cuddled into me. I woke them up and told them I had to go home. They both kissed me goodbye, we exchanged information and they promised me that there were a lot more adventures to come.
When I got home, my wife was passed out in bed with Jessie. Both were naked. Jessie had a tit hanging out of the covers, it was a little saggy compared to the ladies I just spent the evening with.
I started cooking some eggs, but couldn't help of thinking of Amanda and Mary.
I have to confess, I think I am falling in love with two women I just met at an adult bookstore... I've never been treated like that in my life, I felt like a king. Not only was everyone sexually satisfied, we all got along great. Maybe I'm just too deep into a fantasy with two young ladies... but honestly I want more of them. Not even concerned with fucking my wife at this point.

I ust had my first gay fling last night, was out with group friends at local bar trying hook up with girls. But this was not good night struck out. My friend and I decided go back his place ditching our other friends, we get back kicking back on couch talking about be hot share girl to bad we didn't meet one. He suggested let's see what's on cable turned to adult section, he had asked if I ever watched gay porn or did anything with guy. I said no then asked have you. He just smiled pushed play what I saw playing was shocking at first,but did make me curious was two guys giving oral and jacking off. I tried to hide it but he already noticed my bulge through my pants. He said you like it watching this huh, before I could answer he next me rubbing my legs moving closer to my raging hard on. He told me relax closey eyes ,he unIpped my pants my hard cock sprung out, felt his warm lips moving over my tip, moving his tongues down my shaft, licking my balls . I was harder then I ever been it hurt. I grap his head pushing him down on it he let out a gag. He keep working ot moving his tongue all around as if he done it before I started moving up down as if to fuck his mouth. I felt my balls twitching with out warning him released my load I watched as it dripped put his mouth down my shaft and balls on to his couch. Even now thinking about iam jacking off

OK strange confession I am not sure any others have posted anything like this. OK first off, I am David and I am 36 and single at the moment. My confession starts around 4 years ago when An old school friend Mark emailed me out of the blue, I had not seen or heard from him since we were both 20, back then we were both players and were always picking up girls and even sharing them. But we lost touch after he moved away for work. So when he said we should meet up I dropped everything took a few days off and went to meet him at our favorite bar from years ago. It was still early in the afternoon and the bar was almost empty except for a pretty red head woman. I got a beer and sat down to wait for Mark to my surprise the red head got up and came over to me, said hello and smiled I looked at her and I couldn't believe my eyes because the closer I looked it dawned on me, this sexy looking woman was Mark! I didn't know what to say but he/she sat down and told me the story. He had always felt he was a woman and since his family we were well off they paid for the operation and he had been living as a woman now for 10 years. All the years I had known him I never guessed he was like that, true he always had that fem look and was a real pretty boy, but all the girls loved him and he did have a very big cock too.
We talked for a while and was really very surprised just how OK I was with it all, that and I couldn't take my eyes of her breasts, something she did notice. We got a little drunk and I said we should go back to my house, In the taxi and I still have no idea why but as she sat down my hand went to her ass, she looked at me but didn't move. We got to my place and I poured some vodka and told her to make her self at home, I went for a pee and when I came back she was naked. Again I was speechless but she said she knew I really wanted to see so thought she would save time. And if I didn't know she had had a sex change I wouldn't have been able to tell. and to my surprise my cock was getting very hard, I took off my clothes and when my cock bounced out she didn't wait she grabbed it and took it in her mouth and my god she was so good at it. After a few minuets I took control and bent her over the couch I fucked her hard first in her pussy ( I have to tell you it felt the same as any pussy I have ever fucked) I shot my cum and she fell forward It was then she kissed me. We ended up fucking again and I think after that we fell asleep. I woke the next morning she was sleeping next to me, I was feeling a little confused but OK with it.
I made breakfast and she walked into the Kitchen still very naked came up behind me and kissed my neck. as we had breakfast she told me that all the time we hung out together all those years ago she really wanted to fuck with me but I said she was a guy back then and I dawned on me why he would pick up a girl and pretty much always call me and we would share her. She got dressed and we decided to meet up again that night.
We went for a meal and Mandy (Mark's new name) wore a sexy black low cut dress that was so short, she said she wore it because it was the sort of thing that used to attract me years ago. She took me to a bar I had never ever been to before, A gay bar, I thought It would be weird but I really had fun, and she suggested we find a third person for that night, not maybe I was stupid but I thought she wanted to find a girl, like we used too, But she got talking to this guy and she told him about the sex change and then about wanting a third to join us. We all ended up back at his place and were soon naked and I have to saw I was quite a turn on fucking her as she sucked his cock, we took turns at doing both, I was laying back on the bed and I felt a hand on my cock I looked up and saw Mandy holding it but they guy ( still cant remember his name) lowering his mouth onto my cock, They both licked and sucked me till I shot a load of cum into his mouth. Mandy came home with me and I was wanting to fuck her again but she said she was sore and I would have to use her ass so with a fresh tube of lube I fucked her ass hard and fast.
Over the next few months We became a real couple but always every few weeks would find a third to join us, sometimes a man sometimes a woman. Then my little sister came to visit, she didn't call ahead first and walked in on us just at a point where you cant stop and saw me explode all over Mandy's face. She excused herself and we cleaned up and went to join her in the kitchen, she said sorry but I told her it was no big problem and wasn't the first time she had walked in on me over the years
and I will tell you more later because I need to go to work

This is more like a series of confessions than a single one.

I am a male. My sexuality is a bit complicated though.

While I am very aggressive, dominant, and very sadistic at times with women and most transgender women, I also love to be a cuck and be used by men. I have a very big cock and I am attractive, but I love to be used too

I used to be married, and my wife would fuck anyone she wanted, including my friends and our neighbors. Eventually she left me for one of her friends. I have been humiliated and used by people I know and watched them do the same to her and it made me cum just as hard as when I would tie her up and play with her. I wish I was still in a relationship like that but it's not easy to find someone you connect with like that.

Yesterday I had sex with a gorgeous blonde whore I paid 300 to fuck every way you can imagine (with a condom. I don't know how people fuck whores without protection.), in some tiny room on a couch in a rus Sian brothel. I think she is being trafficked but I don't really care it only makes it hotter when I think about it. She told me she is going back to the chech republic in 2 weeks so if I want more to make sure I see her before then. I will. I wish I had enough money to buy her as my own slave.

After that I wanted to be used too so I went to a gay bar and I met a guy there who took me in the bathroom and I sucked his cock for a long time. He had a really nice one. He bent me over and fucked me so hard I came into my boxers and he came in my ass. I let it drip out of me all night. I'm on prep so I'm not worried about that. I want to get fucked more, but I want a gf to watch it happen and humiliate me for it and fuck them too, then fuck her when she is all messy after.

I've done a lot more things than this, and have written about them here anonymously going back to when I was still married, but I felt like confessing this.

Thanks for reading.

It all started after I just got a divorce and had to rent a room in a house in town. I had just lost my job and had just started a new one at entry level pay. I shared the house with two brothers, John and Jack that had inherited the house from their grandmother. They were both jocks that went to the gym everyday and loved sports. I was the opposite kind of small and thin and never really played sports. After the divorce I didn’t really want to have any girlfriends. I started looking at porn on my laptop and started to like the sissy stuff. I wasn’t gay and had always been with women. For some reason this stuff just turned me on. It all started off innocent enough. I would jerk off to sissy porn and then started watching sissy hypno videos. After a couple months went by when I bought my first panties. I never wore them when the brothers were home just when I had the house to myself. I almost died when I left a pair of thongs in the dryer and John found them. They started joking that I must have a new girlfriend and wanted to know when they were going to meet her. I just joked back and told them it was a one night stand. They laughed and congratulated me like I had just scored a touchdown. I had let my hair grow long and told them it was because where I worked they all did. I started driving to the city and trying to buy more stuff. I wanted to buy some stuff like skirts, blouses and shoes. The hardest thing to buy were things like bras, stockings and thing like that. Even though nobody knew who I was I still felt uncomfortable buying these things. I think the way I was embarrassed, they knew I was buying them for myself. Sometimes I would just walk out of the store because I was so embarrassed. That when I decided to start using Amazon. I went crazy! I could buy whatever I wanted and never had to go to a store. I bought all kind of stuff to dress up in. I was going to the post office almost every day. Then things like dildos and things like that started to be recommended to me. I started to try some small dildos and plugs. Oh god I loved it! The more I used them the more I wanted something bigger. I started buying ones that looked like dicks and they were a lot bigger than mine. I got a chastity devise and lock my penis up. It was so cool to not to be able to jerk off when I played my games. I would get horny as hell by not being able to cum for days. That may have been a bad thing looking back! Like I said the guys went to the gym every day and went to the bars most nights so I had the house to myself most of the time. The only problem was the hornier I got the more chances I would take. I almost got caught a couple of time. I swore not to take the chance of getting caught. One day we were all in the kitchen talking and Jack said something about ordering something on line and like a dumbass I said that I had an Amazon account. He said it would be great if he could just use my account to order his stuff. I didn’t know what to say but sure. I immediately went to my room and deleted my history and thought please don’t let him see what I been buying. I thought I had deleted everything and took my laptop to Jack’s room. I logged on for him and he was searching for what he wanted when John called me in to the living room for something. When I got back to Jack he was done ordering and gave me my laptop back and said he would pay me when his stuff came in. I thought everything was ok because everything was normal for a couple of days. Then three days later Jack came in and said John was out for the night and he wanted to talk to me. I sat on the couch and Jack was walking around then he said “I seen the fucked up shit you have bought on line.” My heart dropped and my stomach turned! I didn’t say anything. I just look at the floor and hope it would all go away. It didn’t. Jack said I knew there was something funny about you. Now go upstairs and get changed. I’m going to take a shower so don’t be too long! My head was spinning. I didn’t know what to do. Then Jack yelled “you better get your ass moving sissy or I’m going to stomp your ass in the ground.” I ran upstairs and slammed my door with all kind of thoughts running though my head. I didn’t want to dress up but, I was afraid Jack would kill me if I didn’t do as he said. I grabbed a skirt and blouse off the floor and put them on real fast. I already had panties on. I found some socks and tennis shoes that I had bought for that outfit and put them on. I looked in the mirror and thought to myself I got to do better than this. He’s going to beat the shit out of me. I knew I didn’t have time to put on much makeup so I just put on a little blush and lipstick and pulled my hair up in ponytails to help me look like a girl. I was out of breath and shaking knowing nobody has ever seen me this way. I ran back downstairs and heard the shower still running so I sat on his bed trembling. I heard the water stop and I knew he would be out soon so I tried to relax so he wouldn’t be mad. When I heard the door open my heart stopped. He walked in to the room and said “Holy fuck Scott.” He just stared at me for a while and then said “You make a good looking sissy you little faggot.” I just sat there not knowing what to say when he started to get angry again. Calling me names, saying he was going to tell everyone about me. I started crying a little and he kept yelling. I kept saying I was sorry and begging him not to tell anyone. He pushed me down on the bed and I thought he was going to hit me. He started calling me names like sissy bitch, pussy boy and told me I probably like sucking cocks too. I told him that I wasn’t gay and he just laughed. He took out his cell phone and started taking pics of me. I’m going to let everyone enjoy these. He said he was going to call all the guys at the gym and have them come over and fuck my sissy ass. I kept begging him not to and was really crying now. He said for now on he would call me Sue. He said Scott is not a good name for a sissy faggot. I was lying on the bed curled up in a ball crying and thing got quiet. I looked up and Jack was just standing over top of me. For a few minutes I didn’t know what he was going to do. I felt him sit on the bed and after a while he said “Sit up Sue we need to talk” I sat up and he said it would be ok and not to worry. I was wiping my eyes and he put out his hands like he wanted a hug. I was so confused I didn’t know what to do so I leaned towards him and he gave me a hug. The hug was lasting a long time and he pulled my legs over his lap and was rubbing my back and arms. He kept saying over and over that it will be ok. I was really getting uncomfortable from his touching when all of a sudden he grabbed my ass. I was shaking and afraid to say anything. He kept saying things like “Don’t worry, it will be ok and just relax.” The whole time he was rubbing my legs and ass. For some reason his touching me was beginning to less revolting and my comforting. I almost felt myself start to cuddle up to him. Then he said something that made my fears return. He said “Just do as I say and it will be ok. All you have to do is relax and enjoy this.” I wanted to run but I knew he would get mad again so I just sat there with him while he felt me up. His hands were everywhere, on neck and face, on my arm and the whole time with one on my ass. He put his hand inside of my panties and was squeezing and pulling on my ass cheek. He slid my panties down and was really working on my ass. He started breathing more heavily. A chill ran down my spine when he said “I think it time for you to get out of some of those pretty clothes. I started to pull away and he pulled me in really tight and said “Just do as I say and everything will be ok.” I went limp from defeat and he sat up and pulled me in to a kneeling position. I just close my eyes and let him take control of me. He started to pull on my sweater and blouse until it was pulled out of my skirt. He pulled my sweater up but, I still had my arms down and he said “We can do this the easy way or the hard way. Just do as I say and you might enjoy this. You are a pretty girl. Now act like a pretty girl.” I knew I didn’t have a choice so I raise my arms above my head and let him take my sweater off. After Jack got my sweater off he stood up and looked down at me and said “Sue are you going to be a good girl or am I going to have to call for some help.” I just looked down and didn’t say anything. I heard him pull his cell phone out and it sounded like he was dialing a number. I thought he was bluffing about telling his friends but when he started talking to one of his buddies from the gym named Brice I looked at him in shock. Brice was a very large black guy that was always mean to me. He would always push me around or put me in a head lock. Brice would call me names like little man. I had heard them joke with Brice about the size of his dick. He called it his cunt buster and rectum wrecker. I didn’t have any choice but to look up at Jack and say “I will be a good girl Jack. Please don’t let Brice come over here. I will do anything you want me to do. Please!” Jack looked down at me and told Brice that he had to go because he had a hot bitch on his bed that needed his attention. I don’t know what Brice said but, Jack said he would call him if he needed any help with this cunt. Jack hung up and said I was lucky because Brice would have split my ass in two and if he has any more problems with me that I wouldn’t be able to stop him from calling him to come over. Jack started taking off his clothes and I just sat on the bed looking down, kind of whimpering. I felt Jack approach the bed and said “Time to show me how good of a girl you can be Sue.” I looked up at him. He was naked and looked huge standing over me. He was pulling on his dick and looking down at me. He moved as close as he could to the edge of the bed and ordered “Lick my balls Sue.” I was scared to death and not knowing what to do. I remember thinking it was funny that he was completely shaved. I closed my eyes and stuck out my tongue. I leaned in until my tongue hit him balls. I was trying to think what I would want a woman to do to me when he barked “You better get busy Sue or I’m going to make a call.” I started licking like crazy not knowing if it felt good to him or not. He started to moan so I figured it must be ok. As I licked his balls I took my mouth and started to suck on them to. He seemed to really like that, so I continued to lick and suck on his balls while he was pulling on his dick. He got his phone and was taking more pics and videos. I was able to suck one of his balls in to my mouth and lick it while I sucked on it then I would change and do the same thing to the other one. I thought I must be doing ok his cock was getting really big and he wasn’t threatening me anymore. Then he let go of his cock and it hit me on my forehead. Jack ordered me to suck it. I had never sucked a dick before but I did pretend with my dildos. I figured it would be the same, but it was different. It was warm and soft and bigger than my dildos. I was full of mixed emotions. The man in me wanted to fight back and to stop this, but there was a part of me that wanted to take his cock in my mouth and suck him as deep as I could. He wasn’t moving a bit so any movement was me. The more I sucked his cock the more I wanted to suck him. Now I was rocking back and forth while sucking his cock taking more and more every time. I found myself hoping I was doing a good job and hoping I was better than any women he had fucked before. The thought crossed my mind that I better make him cum or he might want to fuck me. I started to really work on his cock. I grabbed it with my hand and started to jerk him while I was sucking the tip. He was breathing heavy and I thought he was going to cum. Then he pulled my hand off his cock and shoved it all the way in my mouth. My nose was pressed against his stomach and his cock was down my throat. He just held me there for a while. He slowly pulled back and pulled my ponytails so that his cock went all the way in my throat again. I couldn’t breathe when he was all the way in. He would release my hair and I would pull back and catch my breath. As soon as I did he would pull my hair until I was pulled back to the base of his cock. I tried to push back against his thighs to get his cock out of my throat but, the more I pushed the harder he pulled my ponytails. Finally I gave up and let him fuck my throat and hope to get a gasp of air when he pulled back. I was exhausted from the assault on my mouth. Jack started to slow down and was just slowly fucking my mouth. Jack pulled his cock out of my mouth and leaned down and whispered “Ok Sue, it’s time to give me some of that sweet ass of yours.” He pushed me down and pulled my legs towards him. In one swift move he twisted my legs to make me turn over and pulled my hips up so that I was on all fours. Jack opened a drawer next to the bed and grabbed a bottle of oil. He poured some on his cock and I felt it run down the crack of my ass as he poured it on me. Jack said “Reach back and spread that ass you little fucking faggot. I’m going to fuck you so hard you are going to beg me to stop.” I reached back with one hand and pulled my ass cheek. His cock was sliding up and down my ass crack. I almost wanted to thank him for using the oil. His cock was a lot bigger than anything I had put in my ass before so I was really scared. When I played with my toys I would go nice and slow so I could get used to the size. I pleaded to Jack to be easy and he started laughing. I knew he wasn’t going to be nice. Jack was rubbing his cock around my asshole but, not sticking it in. That’s when he leaned in and said “I want you to fuck my cock sissy. Don’t go slow, don’t be easy just slam your ass back as hard as you can. I want you to make it come all the way out and then slam your ass back down on it. Don’t stop until I tell you too.” I begged him not to make me rape my own ass. I was starting to cry. I know even my smallest dildo didn’t go in without a little discomfort and he wanted me to take his big cock that was twice the size of anything I had ever tried before. Jack was starting to get impatient. He reached around and grabbed my throat so I couldn’t breathe. He said “Get busy you little whore or I’m going to shove my fist up your ass. You would probably like that wouldn’t you.” I tried to say something but, I couldn’t talk with his hand on my throat. He released me and I choked as I said “Please don’t. I’ll be a good whore.” I knew what I had to do so I made up my mind to just get it over with. I could feel his hard cock at the entrance of my asshole so I pushed back to build up pressure and with all my force pushed back as hard as I could. His cock slid all the way in to the base and I screamed in a high pitch squeal. My ass was burning like I had just sat on a red hot rod. I was panting rapidly not able to catch my breath. Then he hollered “Pull it out”. I leaned forward until his cock was out of me. God it hurt just as bad going out as it did going in. Jack ordered me to do it again. I began to repeat the process of me slamming my ass down on his cock and pulling away until he was completely out. It was still hurting like hell but I guess my ass was starting to stretch to the size of his cock. After a few times I was getting into a rhythm when I heard him say “They are going to love this.” He started saying “Come on you fucking whore fuck my cock.” I knew he was videoing me fucking his cock with my ass. The more I repeated slamming his cock in my ass; I could feel myself starting to get aroused. My dick was getting hard and my ass was tingling. After several minutes I found myself getting into this experience. I would moan every time his cock would enter me and squeezing my ass trying to hold it in. I was a whore. Jack told me to stop and I heard myself moan a disappointing sound. He pushed me away and laid down on the bed. He pulled my hair and pushed my face towards his cock and said “Suck my dirty cock you fucking little slut.” I was way past the point of refusing. I pulled his cock in to my mouth like I was starving for it. I needed him to be satisfied. I was his slut and it was my duty to please him. I had sucked his cock and balls and fucked his cock with my ass. Now it was my responsibility to make him cum. I was sucking him like a crazed whore. Jerking him and sucking him all the way to the base of his cock. While I was sucking him I reached down and started jerking my own dick. I was a horny slut needing to cum. The more I pulled on my dick the more effort I made to get him to cum. I heard him chuckle and point his phone at me. Then he said “What a nasty whore you turned out to be. Now beg for me to cum.” I knew it was another video so I pulled my mouth off his cock and said “Please Jack cum for me. Feed me your cum. I need you to cum in my mouth. I will be your whore forever. I will suck your cock, lick your balls and fuck you whenever you want. I will be your nasty slut to use anyway you like. PLEASE just cum for me!” I was so close to cumming I would have said anything. Jack got up and stood beside the bed and said “Open your mouth bitch.” I sat up opened my mouth and stuck out my tongue while he stood in front of me jerking his cock. He started to cum and shot his cum on the side of my face. He moved closer. I could feel load after load hitting the back of my throat and on my tongue. Jack pushed me back on the bed and took several pics of me with my cum covered face and said “Fuck Sue that was awesome. I can’t wait until tomorrow!”

I’m looking for a specific porn video, if anyone has seen it lmk. It’s gay porn, and gangbang/non con. It starts with a guy getting fucked on a couch by two other guys. He’s masterbating, then I think gets his wrists taped and gets bent over the back of the couch, where he gets fucked from both ends for a while. Eventually one of the guys puts duct tape over his mouth and they start fucking his ass harder. It cuts to them on the floor, and his wrists are tied with cord or rope, and he’s gagged with cloth or something. He’s laying on his stomach and struggling, the other guys tell him to hold still/keep his legs spread. At the end, he gets tied to some kind of weight lifting bench I think, still getting fucked from both ends. This vid was on Xxnx for a long time(the title was just “gay sex”)before it got removed one day, and I haven’t been able to find it since. It was one of my favs, I’m hoping someone remembers it. 

Part A4: Ladies Nights Out [for all the other stories pm me, I can send you the links]
Hey guys :-** me again Anna. So this is again before my wedding. Another one of Patty's crazy ideas. Well... She had some game in mind. Haley was with us this time... We went to a lesbian bar. Now, its not exclusive for women or anything, it just had a reputation. When we were standing in front of the door, Patty told us the task of the night: Get as many women as possible to touch you. Haley and me werent really going for it, but Patty would try her best of course.

When we got in and sat down at our table, I looked around. Some of the girls were definitely not my type, but there were some really good looking ones as well. I noticed that we got a lot of looks when we came in. Patty got us some drinks. She got some looks, no wonder when she was walking around in that short tight red dress. I couldnt even see a bra underneath I was almost sure she didnt wear any. We had our first drinks and chatted a little. We hadnt had a chance to talk as 3 a lot. Patty told us about how boring school was. She did most of the talking anyway. When she went a second time to get drinks, it took longer because she obviously flirted with a girl at the bar. When she came back she didnt comment on that at all though.
Next round was on Haley. Haley wore tight jeans and a white tank top. A girl sitting close to her at the bar talked to her for a while. I even saw her blush and she almost forgot our drinks on the way back.
H:"This is weird."
P:"What? Dont you like beautiful girls?"
H:"Well yes but..."
P:"But what?"
Me:"I think what she wants to say is that she is not gay."
P:"Well so what? Loosen up a little, try something new."
H:"I dont know..."
P:"Come on, dont be a coward."
Me:"You know, she's not all wrong. Maybe you should try talking to that girl."
H:"I really dont know."
P:"Look she is already looking over. Again."
Me:"What, are you jealous?"
P:"ME? No way. I'll show you how jealous I am."

She went to the bar and after a short conversation kissed the girl she flirted with before. Then Patty led the girl up a flight of stairs. I took Haley to the bar and sat her next to the girl she talked to before. I went back to the table and watched her for afar. Soon the girl kissed her. It was an innocent kiss. The girl got up and led Haley up the stairs as well. I felt alone so I followed them. Upstairs there were many couches. Only a few were filled though. I looked for Haley and found her soon. She was still kissing that girl. She still looked cute and innocent. And that really turned me on. I sat on a couch with the back to the stairs. Now I also saw Patty. She had already dropped one of her straps, I couldnt see her tit from my perspective. I could see the other girls tits though. They were kissing and fingering each other. I couldnt help myself and started masturbating. My pussy was wet already. When I looked up at Haley again, they were already caressing each other as well. I couldnt hold back anymore and started fingering my pussy. I was so fixed on Haley and Patty that I didnt see the woman coming. She just sat next to me and said "Do you like what you see?"
I jumped, removing my hand from my crotch. It was woman around my age. She laughed. "Dont worry, I like watching too. Do you mind if I join you?"
I didnt answer and just looked at Haley and Patty again.
The woman said "You can go on ... help yourself...I will do the same."
She spread her legs and started fingering her perfectly shaved pussy. I couldnt look away. Slowly I began masturbating again. I looked at the woman again. She smiled at me. We both watched my sisters in silence. Patty was naked to the waist, scissoring the other girl. Haley Was still just kissing, but her girl had a hand on her thighs as well. And suddenly I felt a hand on my thigh as well. I looked at the hand of the woman next to me. She said "do you mind ..."
Her hand went to my pussy and I sighed a little. The woman took that as her answer and really went for it. I spread my legs then close them again.
Me:"I... I dont know... I've a fiancé.."
Her:"And I have a husband. But men dont know how to finger you..."
I just let her have her way with me. I came after just a few more seconds, going "uhggghghg"
Her:"see? Told you."
She didnt stop though. I kept staring at Haley and Patty. I could feel the second orgasm coming. Stronger. More explosive. And when it came, I squirted all over the couch. Finally her hand retreated. I had my eyes closed and when I opened them the woman next to me was gone. Patty was done soon after and Haley followed. When we were outside, Patty bragged about how much fun she had. Haley was super quiet. After we had let Patty out at home, I talked to Haley.
Me:"Why are you so quiet? Come on you can tell me!"
H:"I... I just never had such a strong orgasm as tonight..."
Me:"Why do you look so upset then?"
H:"I... I'm just afraid I wont find any man who can please me like that."
I immediately thought of SAM. Altough he lacked the fingering skills, he could still make me cum just as hard and even harder.
H:"What are you thinking about? You just bit your lip like you were thinking of something ... erotic."
Me:"I did. I'm sure you'll meet somebody who can please you just like that girl tonight." What I didnt say was - I'm not sure if you're going to fuck him though. He is mine.
H:"I hope you are right..."
Me:"I know I am."

Hope you enjoyed Part A4 guys :-*** love you all :-)

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