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Bathtub & Shower Deaths

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Female deaths or near deaths in the bathtub or shower from TV shows, movies, amateur films, or porn films. As long as it involves a female and it's in a bathtub or shower, and it's not a real death only a fantasy death, then it's allowed. Pool deaths or near deaths can be allowed as long as the female is nude or in a bathing suit. Prefer the females to be nude. Images of bathtub and shower deaths and any other water scenes are allowed as well.

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6
Anonymous
@confessions
16 Nov 2014 3:42PM
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When I was younger and chatrooms were still popular, I spent some time on Yahoo in local, state chatrooms. I chatted with a few women over the years, but had never worked up the courage to actually meet one in person. The internet still had a stigma attached to it back then and I guess I was just afraid of the potential consequences.

When I was 22, I began having a conversation with a 40 year old, married mom whom lived about an hour and a half from me. Her children were older so they were rarely home and her husband was deployed to Afghanistan. She told me that their relationship had been slowly deteriorating for months. She said the few times that she would get to talk to him, it often ended in an argument and that they were most likely headed for divorce once he returned home permanently.

She was a beautiful woman. She told me that before her husband had left, she was a bit heavier, but had worked her tail off to lose the extra weight. By the time we began chatting, she was down to I’d guess around 130 pounds—perfect for her five foot, seven inch frame.

We chatted for several weeks and would occasionally use the webcam. Webcam technology was still pretty new and the image was always laggy and blurry with no sound. As our conversations became more intimate, I would ask for her to show me different things. She was hesitant to show me her breasts. She explained how the weight loss had taken its toll on them. Reluctantly, she showed me. While I thought she was gorgeous either way, she was right. The radical change to her body had done wonders in other places, but the opposite was true in others.

One day, after having been absent from Yahoo Messenger for a few days, she hopped on and said that she was sorry that she had been away. She said that she had had some surgery and wanted to show me something. She turned on her webcam and proceeded to take off her shirt and bra to show me that she had gotten breast implants. Like I said, I thought she was beautiful before, but now every inch of her body was perfect. She would definitely be causing heads to turn everywhere she went.

She told me that I was the first to see them and that she hoped I would see them in person someday. We exchanged phone numbers and within a day or two she texted me to tell me that she was in town to pick up her husband from the airport. His plane would not be coming in until the next day. She had gotten a hotel room downtown and had nothing to do so she wanted to know if I would want to meet to have coffee or something. I agreed to the meeting, despite being nervous as hell.

We had planned to meet at Starbuck’s. It was my hope to get their first simply so she would have to come up to me as I was scared to death to have to come up to her. When I arrived, I was too late. I could see her standing at the counter waiting for her order, but I could really only see her from the side. As I approached the counter from behind her, I heard the kid working the register tell her how beautiful she looked. She said thank you and turned around to see me standing there nervously. My jaw nearly hit the floor. She was stunning! She wore a tight tank tope that amplified her already amazing cleavage. She was also wearing those sexy, cat-eye glasses that I absolutely love on girls.

We awkwardly hugged and I placed my order before joining her out on the patio. We made small talk for well over an hour. It was getting later in the afternoon—early evening. I asked if she wanted to go somewhere and get some dinner. She agreed so we walked a few blocks to a nice Italian restaurant where we had a nice dinner and a few drinks. We continued to make small talk for another good while before I finally paid the check and waited to see where things went next.

I nearly jumped for joy when she asked if I would like to go back to her hotel room and order a movie or something. We walked to her hotel and as we were going up the elevator, yet another guy commented on how beautiful she was. He looked at me jealously as if he knew what was going through my mind.

We entered the room and we both made ourselves comfortable on the bed. She turned on the TV and began searching the pay-per-view titles for a movie to watch. She could’ve turned on anything at that point—I didn’t care. She picked a movie and we began to watch. While I do remember the name of the movie, I couldn’t tell you anything about it as my mind was racing a hundred miles an hour.

We lay there for about forty-five minutes to an hour in silence—except for me getting up to go to the bathroom every ten minutes because I was so damn nervous. Finally, I figured it was now or never so I gently began to caress her cheek with the back of my hand before leaning over and kissing her. This lead to a very passionate make out session before I asked if I could finally see the work that she done.

She lifted her shirt over her head and I wrapped my arms around her back to unclasp her bra. I threw it to the floor, exposing the biggest, most perfect pair of breasts that I had ever been this close to. I asked if I could touch them or if they still hurt too much for them to be handled. She said that she had taken some painkillers as soon as we returned to the room so it would be fine. I gently placed my hands on them being very careful not to be too rough. However, she insisted that she was fine and such delicate care was not required. I continued to fondle her as we kissed, our tongues swirling in and out of each other’s mouths. I lowered my head and carefully licked her breasts, churning my tongue around her nipples.

She told me to lie back and relax. She removed her shorts leaving on the lacey, pink panties that she wore. She undid my belt, unbuttoned my jeans and slowly slid down my zipper. She was somewhat surprised by the fact that I wasn’t wearing underwear, but this only slowed her a second as she took my cock in to her hand. She stroked it gently before lowering her head to give it a lick. She slid her tongue down the length of it stopping at the base to take my balls in to her mouth. She slid back up and whirled her tongue around the head before finally taking the whole thing in to her mouth.

It was pure ecstasy! I had never felt anything like this—the things she could do with her tongue! I desperately tried to recite baseball statistics in my head to keep from cumming too soon so that I could enjoy this for as long as possible. I gave the best effort that I could before finally exploding in to her mouth. It was the most intense orgasm I had ever had. She swallowed it all and smiled as she came up and rested her head on my chest. She must have been able to feel how fast my heart was racing.

We laid there for a few minutes. The entire time she was gently playing with my now soft cock in her hand. After a few minutes, I was hard again and she began stroking me harder. I tried to slide my hand into the front of her panties, but she cut me off and resisted my advance. I told her how bad I wanted to fuck her. She said that she wanted me too, but unfortunately, it was just not a convenient time of the month to do so. So she continued to just stroke my cock for a few minutes.

I was as hard as a rock; throbbing in her hand when suddenly, she stopped and excused herself to the bathroom. I hedged my bets and assumed this was simply and excuse to make preparations as she wanted to fuck as badly as I did. I reached down and took my wallet from my pants that were still lying on the end of the bed. I removed one of the condoms that I had bought on my way to meet her in hopes that something like this would happen. I had been so nervous about what this encounter would be like that I bought those condoms with the desensitizing lubricant to help ensure that you can last longer. I took one and placed it on the corner of the nightstand.

A moment later she returned from the bathroom, having removed the pair of panties that had blocked me from getting to her pussy earlier. She was ready, and so was I. She noticed the condom that I had placed on the nightstand. Standing next to the bed, she took the condom and unrolled it down my penis before climbing on top of me and guiding me in to her pussy.

We fucked forever—in every position imaginable. If it hadn’t been for the extended pleasure condom; I know I only would have lasted a couple of minutes, if not a few seconds. I eventually reached the point where I desperately wanted to cum, but the condom was working all too well. I knew that if I kept it on, I was never going to climax.

Remembering one of our more intimate conversations from Yahoo, I knew that doggy style was her favorite position so I asked if we could do that next. She happily climbed up on all fours and I took my position behind her, discreetly removing the condom in the process. We were facing the mirror so I could see the look on her face as I slid my now naked cock inside of her. She could tell right away what I had done, but didn’t seem inclined to care. I began thrusting harder and harder and told her that I was going to cum. In the slightest whimper, she said, “I want you to cum inside me, baby.”

That was the moment of no return as I thrust my cock one last time and pulled her as close I could by her ass. I unloaded inside of her before we both finally collapsed on the bed. We continued to lie there, now in the dark; kissing and fondling each other before finally falling asleep in each other’s arms.

We spent the entire next day texting back and forth about the encounter and how incredible it had been for both of us. Later that week, she told me that she was going to be coming back to the city to return her husband to the airport. She asked if she could stay with me once she was rid of him. At this point in time I had just returned home from college and was still living with my parents. I was too embarrassed to tell her, so I essentially just dodged the question and explained that I would be busy. Our messages became fewer and fewer over the next couple of days before just finally ending altogether.

To this day, I still think about this night and recreate it in my mind. About a year ago, right before my own wedding, I decided to see if I could find her. All I had to go on was a first name, an old cell phone number that was no longer in service, and the screen name she had used on Yahoo Messenger.

After some creative Googling, I managed to find her Facebook profile. I discovered that she was now living in another state as her husband had been reassigned. They were still married; apparently living much happier than she was at the time of our meeting. I sent her a friend request, but she never responded. I took this to mean that it was best to leave well enough alone. I still check in on her Facebook page from time to time. I have since learned that her son is right around my age and that her daughter, only a couple of years younger than me, is as gorgeous as her mother.

I wish that I could simply tell her how much that night meant to me, but I wouldn’t want to risk jeopardizing her marriage or my own. I am left with the lasting memory in the back of my mind and very few days pass that I do not recall that evening and wish that I would have met her again the following week like she wanted to.

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11
Anonymous
@confessions
24 Nov 2014 9:44AM
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For my protection and my friend this is a fantasy story. it is up to you to decide if it is true or not. but i am not saying that it is. This did not really happen. But, if it did, I would be confessing something that has haunted me for 2 years. My wife of 10 years died of an aneurism suddenly while she was at work. She was an executive assistant for a large company in San Francisco. We had no children. A friend of hers called me in tears before the police arrived at my place of business, which I will not identify. Oddly, I was composed while being told on the phone, kind of. I kept repeating "what?, what?" as if I didn't understand what she was saying. Her crying and sobbing made it clear this wasn't a bad joke. But, I just kept saying "what?" "what?", getting a bit loud at the end. None of my coworkers noticed my demeanor given the nature of our work. My reaction could have been consistent with a normal business call. I cannot explain. I don't remember hanging up the phone. I was sitting there with my mind spinning. trying to make sense of the phone call. I was in complete denial. After a few minutes, I started playing solitaire on my laptop. crazy, i know. but, i didn't know what to do. somehow, the game actually distracted me and I managed to put the phone call behind me. I was strangely at some kind of weird peace. But then I fainted when I saw 2 uniformed police officers standing at the end of the hallway asking a coworker which one was me. When she pointed at me, I suddenly blacked out from shock. They revived me shortly. I did not injure myself in the fall. The older female officer asked me to confirm my name, and then told me what I already knew. I got sick. I threw up until I was dry heaving. I could not believe it. I became hysterical and had to be escorted out by the officers. I didn't really think about it until we arrived at the hospital that they were taking me to identify her body. I panicked. But, a doctor gave me something, I presume a sedative shot. It calmed me down real quick. When they lifted the covering to show her face, i was calm. probably from the drugs. i said, yes that is my wife. next thing I knew I was home. The county medical examiner conducted a pretty quick autopsy to determine the aneurism. I thought those things took longer than that, but I guess they had a good idea what it was and scanned her brain to confirm it.

Her mom took care of the phone calls and funeral arrangements as I was in complete despair. Something that no one knew is that my wife and I were getting a divorce. We had not seen a lawyer or told anyone, yet. She asked for it. That also devastated me. I am an average looking guy, but she was practically a model. She was a cheerleader in high school and college. she was 5 ft 3 in., 120 lbs. light brown hair with hazel eyes. Now she was dead at the age of 33. We had not had sex in 5 years, despite my best efforts. She eventually told me that she had no interest in sex. I did not suspect she was having an affair. I knew her better than that. She knew it was hurting me, so we went to a few specialists and she was diagnosed with hypoactive sexual desire disorder. I did some research and now believe that it could be related to the aneurism that eventually killed her. She was going to file for divorce so that I could find someone who could fulfill my needs. I did not want it but she was very adamant.

A older man I met at church about 3 or so years before this tragedy, ended up being the guy who would be her embalmer at the funeral home. He came to my home to tell me and ask if I wanted him to get someone else, someone I didn't know, to do this THING to my wife. I told him no. it was his job and I trusted him. He kept offering to ask for another embalmer, but I assured him i was fine with it. He was very kind and gentle. He offered his condolences with a tear or two to match my own as he headed for the door. Before I shut the door, he turns abruptly, as if he had forgot something, and asked me if I wanted to see her that night. The transfer to the funeral home from the hospital had already been made. She was in a refrigerated unit at the funeral home. He was going to start the embalming process in the morning once all the paperwork had been filed. I don't know why exactly, but I said yes. I followed him to the home. it was late, probably 11 pm, maybe later. He told me that he was not supposed to do this, so please not to let anyone know. I assured him I would not.

I was expecting stainless steel drawers with handles, like you see in the movies and tv shows, but it was a decent size room that was refrigerated. inside, were three gurneys with people who had died that day. One was my wife, another was a 70+ year old man who had died of a massive heart attack earlier that day while having lunch with his wife. He was a large man, maybe 6 ft 2, 270 or 290, i don't know maybe 300. big guy. the covered body on the third gurney was shaped very similar to my wife. He told me it was a girl who was a passenger in a car with another girl who crashed while texting and driving. the driver lived. This girl, was not wearing her seatbelt. she was thrown fro the vehicle and broke her neck. died instantly. He couldn't keep talking about it. for some reason, the young girls death chokes him up and effects him more than even my wifes. I assume it was because she was so young. a mere teen. He starts to say something, but stops.

So, he's quite emotional after this day and says I can stay as long as I like, until he comes back to get me or I came looking for him, whichever happened first. He was going into the chapel area to nap on one of the benches.

he left me alone with three dead bodies in a cold room. I stood there for what seemed like several minutes before I approached my wifes body. I pulled back the covering. There she was, as I had seen her before. I stared at her still made up face from work. They hadn't had a chance to clean her up for embalming yet. She was very white, kinda bluish. But, still just as attractive as the girl I fell in love with in college.

I guess it was an impulse. without even looking around to make sure no one was watching, I pulled the covering down to expose her breasts. I don't know how its supposed to work, post morten, but her nipples, which I hadn't seen in 5 years, were very erect. Her breasts are not very big. She is a small b cup, but still very perky for her age. NOW, I looked around and even went to the chapel to see if my friend was awake. He was snoring loudly.

I suddenly, with a very confusing mix of guilt and excitement, started getting hard. I hurried back to the cold room. I realized I had left the covering half off while I checked on my friend. I didn't bring a jacket, so I was pretty chilly, but my blood starting flowing and suddenly I began to warm up. I pulled my phone from my pocket. i was going to take some nudies of my dead wife. at that point, my cock had taken over and I didn't care how messed up any of this was.

so, with a shudder, I pulled the covering all the way off to the floor. I was in shock. I was expecting a bush, considering she had no interest in sex, but there she was... with the thinnest most perfectly trimmed landing strip I had ever seen on her. I was naturally confused, but didn't waste time wondering "why" she did it, or possibly "for whom" she was doing it. I started snapping photos and got very excited.

that's when things got out of hand. I was so turned on, I wanted to see her pussy. on the table, her cold outer labia was flesh colored and closed. I spread the covering on the ground and picked her up to put her on the floor.

rigor mortis is unsettling to say the least. while her legs and arms did bend down under the weight of gravity, her left leg and left arm seemed to stay more stiff. even her head didn't fall back like I would have expected.

i got her to the floor. and had a difficult time getting her legs to come apart. I finally figured to massage the legs to make them more pliable. eventually, she lay on the cold floor, naked, legs spread showing her perfect and tight pussy. and she was dead.

i didn't stop to think. i kept taking pictures and then realized... i realized the obvious. it was cold, but I got my pants down to my knees and knelt to the floor.

I don't believe in god like most people. i believe in a higher power but don't think he pays any attention to us. i hope I am right. i put my cock against her freezing cold pussy. rigor mortis, no moisture in her pussy, no lubricant. i was screwed.

i had gone this far. i wasn't going to be denied the pussy that was legally mine, at least while she was alive. I started going through drawers. finally, two rooms down the hall, I found some lubricant that I didn't even want to think about why they had it.

Back in the room, I dropped to the floor. I greased up my still throbbing cock. then, gently started applying lube to her pussy. it didn't feel as soft and fleshy as i remembered, but once I got my cock in, I remembered the ecstasy of having sex with my beautiful loving wife.

her eyes were closed, so I wiped my hands and opened them. I was a little surprised when they stayed open. I was fucking my dead wife as she seemed to look at me. I suddenly came harder than i can ever remember. it just kept pumping cum until it started oozing out her vagina.

i fell to the floor next to her. started playing with her erect nipples. and it wasn't more than 2 minutes before my erection returned.

as i lay on the floor, i could see the other two gurneys against the wall, side by side... then I got an evil thought in my head. yes, you know what I did.

I jumped up. penis purple and throbbing out of control. I walked slowly over to the other dead girl. I had no idea what she looked like.

I pulled back the cover and my jaw dropped. she was the most perfect looking blonde I had ever seen. her hair was cut short, up to her neck. And if i had any doubts about if she was a natural blonde before, I just saw the proof. a small patch of silky blonde hair sitting on top of her pussy mound. her tits were also not very big, but thats okay. she had thin, but muscular legs that made them look longer than they were. I noticed a nasty scrape on her left arm and left hip. not too big, and they had been cleaned.

the sheet goes to the floor next to my dead wife. this girl was even lighter than my wife. And somehow she seemed a bit more limber. I don't know why. I repeated the process., massaging her legs until they parted and revealed the smallest set of pussy lips I've ever seen. In a perfect clam shape with still some rosy pinkness left. her lips were also fuller than my wifes. not a lot, but they were cushiony to the touch. I took some books from a nearby shelf to put under their heads so I could see their faces better.

The girls eyes were still closed. When I opened them, they were bright gray, like so many movie stars. except for the scrapes from the accident, her flesh was smoother than my wifes, as a teen girls flesh would be. My wife was stunning. The perfect sex object now displaying her wares. And now this strange girl, legs spread, bright gray eyes appearing to look into mine. neither naked female able to smile, since they were dead. I make sure everything ls lubed appropriately and just before i enter this fresh coed, it occurs to me to check something.

I pulled apart her lips and with some work, and found...a hymen. if there is a god, i'm going to hell anyway. I gently enter her. looking into her eyes, then over at my wife who was now watching me fuck a dead teen girl. when I said her pussy was small and tight, and now a hymen? I wasn't kidding. I have an average size penis, about 5-6 inches. but, the blood had been pumping so long, I has as thick as I was long at this point.

I started to think it was't going to work, then decided I was going to MAKE it happen. the lube was adequate. I pulled back for a forceful thrust and grabbed her shoulders for support as I pushed hard. i felt ripping flesh. i mean lots of ripping flesh. i looked down and saw some blood. just what rubbed off her vagina as I made her a woman. I kept going. my god, it was impossibly tight. within a minute, i had again cum more than i thought i had in me.

i cleaned myself off, thinking it was time to put everyone back in place. but, i saw them again. lying side by side. these two beautiful women, totally naked. and totally mine to do as I wish.

I rolled the both over. they could have been mother and daughter. perfect asses. just absolutely perfect. i lubed up. started pumping my wifes asshole. When she was alive, she said that is something she would NEVER EVER do. out of the question. Yet, there I was. pushing my cock into her asshole. it felt a little, grainy, i guess? but obviously very tight. She was dead. I could go as deep as I wanted. I pushed and pushed, grinding into her cold, but bouncy soft ass cheeks. it felt incredible.

then, the girl. it felt about the same, but her ass was smoother, heaving and swollen, although, quite cold which I had gotten used to. I managed to lift her to her knees, sort of. i grabbed her tits and pulled myself into her as deeply as I possible could. that's when the final and most powerful gushing of cum started. I'm laying on her back kissing her neck as my cock empties into her. at that moment i thought of the girl who was driving. how much more guilty she would feel if she saw her friends hymen and asshole torn to shreds because she couldn't wait to text later.

an hour or so later, I had cleaned everything up. found new coverings. the old ones were quite dirty now. and had both in place and looking pretty much like they did when I arrived.

i put the dirty sheets in my car and trashed them later.

after I was sure i had all in order, i woke my friend, the embalmer. he was embarrassed he has slept so long. I told him it was fine, because I got to say goodbye to my wife.

He tells me he is going to stay and start the embalming since its almost morning, anyway. He walks me to the door. gives me a hug and tells me again how sorry he is. then...what he says next, well, that is why I'm confessing today. I'm an evil person. More than you know. My friend, who was kind enough to bring me to the funeral home to see my wife... he tells me what he was too emotionally choked up to say before his chapel nap.

that poor girl in the room with my wife? that was his granddaughter. She had just graduated high school and was heading to a Purity Pledge meeting before heading to Summer Camp. A Christian group of teens that pledge to maintain their virginity until marriage. He said to me that the only solace he could find in this senseless death, is that she will go to her grave having kept her promise.

Yes. I am going to hell.

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http://www.laughspin.com/2014/07/04/anthony-cumia-fired-why-racist-twitter-rant-led-to-firing-from-opie-and-anthony-siriusxm-show/

By Melissa Siegel July 4, 2014 at 11:54 am 90 Comments News, TV/Movies Tags: anthony cumia, anthony cumia fired, anthony cumia fired opie and anthony, anthony cumia fired racist twitter rant, anthony cumia fired twitter rant, anthony cumia racism, anthony cumia racist twitter rant, anthony cumia twitter rant, colin quinn, opie and anthony, opie and anthony colin quinn, opie and anthony show, opie and anthony twitter

Anthony Cumia

Anthony Cumia, one half of the radio duo Opie & Anthony, was fired on Friday following what many are describing as a shocking racist Twitter rant.

The rant came after Cumia was allegedly attacked by an African-American woman in Times Square.

“SiriusXM has terminated its relationship with Anthony Cumia of the Opie & Anthony channel,” said Patrick Reilly, the Senior Vice p******** of Communications for SiriusXM.”The decision was made, and Cumia informed, late Thursday, July 3 after careful consideration of his racially-charged and hate-filled remarks on social media. Those remarks and postings are abhorrent to SiriusXM, and his behavior is wholly inconsistent with what SiriusXM represents.”

Anthony Cumia confirmed the firing news on his Twitter page Friday morning. And needless to say, the radio jock was not happy about it.

Sirius decided to cave and fire me. Welcome to bizarro world. Fired for shit that wasn’t even on the air & wasn’t illegal. So, who’s next?

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 4, 2014

RT @TedChrist: @AnthonyCumia Not suspended? Fired, so fired? -Fired, fired, so fired.

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 4, 2014

The rant that led to Anthony Cumia’s stunning firing took place early Wednesday, hours after the host was allegedly assaulted in Times Square. Cumia then went on a Twitter tirade full of racist and sexist remarks. You can view the (very NSFW) rant below.

So, I’m taking pix in NYC & a black girl who was in frame punched me in the face. I called her a fucking “&$;;-:” cause that’s what she WAS!

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

Then she punched me 5 more times. She’s lucky I was a white legal gun owner or she’d be dead. Then 5 blacks started giving me shit!

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

I told them to back the fuck off, this wasn’t their show. The cunt then punched me again. Seems white boys don’t hit back. Lucky savage.

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

Wish a cop was around. Although she said she’d tell them I sexually harassed her. Lying cunt. I hope she gets shot in her ass fuck face. Ugh

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

They aren’t people.

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

Im fucking livid. If I was an illegal savage I’d have shot her. The I are violence in her was so predictable. I hope she gets killed.

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

It’s a jungle out in our cities after midnight. Violent savages own the streets. They all came 2 defend this pig. I had to yell like at dogs

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

RT @justacword: @AnthonyCumia did you get any photos of her -Yup. Animal pig fuck cunt bitch

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

RT @tikiruss: @AnthonyCumia WTF? For no reason? -Reason!?? I WAS WHITE!!!

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

Savage violent animal fucks prey on white people. Easy targets. This CUNT has no clue how lucky she was. She belted me 10 times. I had a gun

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

RT @RonLR2: @AnthonyCumia So, what started all this? -I was taking pix in Times Square. She was in a pic. Violence was her answer. ANIMAL

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

The cunt animal kept walking into my arm I had up as a block saying “DONT TOUCH ME!” Then would hit me. I hope a home boy beats her to death

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

The automatic jump to violence in that community is astounding. No discussion. It’s start punching at the least little thing. Uncivilized!!

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

RT @HuntsvilleDore:a female beat u? -No,an ANIMAL BITCH used it’s instinctual violence on me. I restrained myself from putting it to sleep

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

RT @KyleScutch: Did u hit her back -I was fooled by my upbringing. “Don’t hit a woman”. But this was an animal. I shoulda smashed it’s face

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

The switch to violence is immediate. No discussion, just violence. When will THAT be addressed? Oh, right, never. Slavery did it? Oh, ok.

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

There’s a deep seeded problem with violence in the black community. Try to address it and you’ll be exiled to racistville. But it’s real.

— Anthony Cumia (@AnthonyCumia) July 2, 2014

While it is easy to understand how this racist rant got Anthony Cumia fired, this was not the first time the shock jock has made controversial remarks. In fact, Cumia has made so many racist comments during the “Opie and Anthony” show that we are surprised he wasn’t fired before. Per Jezebel, he once accused the media of “coddling” African-Americans.

“The press will coddle black people,” Anthony Cumia said during once “Opie & Anthony” rant. “It’s unbelievable the extent the press will go to to try not to offend and try this inclusion. The f–ked up thing is people were getting upset that so many black people were being portrayed as criminals on the news. That’s it. And sorry, there’s a large percentage—it’s disproportionate to the population of this country of black people committing crimes.”

And way before Anthony Cumia’s firing, he supposedly yelled at African-American callers who disagreed with his views.

“You’re not gonna get 100% of whitey to kiss your fucking ass with their guilt,” Anthony Cumia supposedly told one caller. “F–k you and f–k your mother! I’m a text book guy. I’ve been a text book guy my whole life. I use facts!”

Listen to another racist rant from Anthony Cumia below.

Still, this history of racism has not stopped some from supporting Anthony Cumia after his firing. Colin Quinn, a frequent guest of “Opie and Anthony,” used a famous quote from Voltaire to defend his friend’s behavior.

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@confessions
22 Sep 2012 6:31PM
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My best friends boyfriend stopped me in the hall yesterday and was telling me that they where having all kinds of problems and he wasnt sure if he wanted to go with her to the homecomming dance comming up. He asked me to come over after school to tolk about it becuase shes devistated. We have been best friends since we were little and I love her to death.

I got there and we talked and talked an basicaly he just got sick of her. There wastn alot I could do and I finally convinced him him to just take her as friends. We agreed and he said he would take me home in a few he wanted to shower. So he went in the hall and I was watching tv on his bed and he came in totally naked. I could not stop starring at his dick, its big and thick and he had a great body. Hes kinda nerdy and does that jumping around on buildings stuff I had no idea thats what he looked like naked. I was acting like i couldn't see so I have no idea if he noticed or not.

He txted me all day today and he is comming over later to help me pick a dress on the computer.

I am very shy and reserved but I have a freak side that no one knows about, thats the reason I am even on this site.

So I confess when he comes over I want to suck his cock, slobber all over it, I want him to bend me over a chair and slowly slide his big dick in my little pussy. I want him to pound me from behind untill I scream then pul out and cum all over my face.

There I feel better.

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realbudmachine
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@confessions
21 Aug 2012 3:57AM
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I confess I like to steal my friends/buddies gf's/wives/family members panties and sniff them (if they're dirty - my fav), wear them, and jerkoff with them on my face, sometimes I like to cum in them too. I've taken everything from thongs by VS, panties by VS, arie panties, generic thongs and panties. I've even stole a top (I cd every once in a while).

Today I stole my buddies sisters(she's in college and a hottie) superman panties. Thankfully they were dirty(tho not enough). I'm sniffing them right now. They weren't stinky enough to smell her ass or her pussy (she's an incredibly clean girl). They were the only underwear I could find in her room. Should have gone and got one of his moms thongs (she's smokin too).

Last weekend I was in another state for my cousins wedding, and I got to stay in my cousins old room at my aunt and uncles house. she had been home for her brothers wedding from college and left a suitcase there on her floor. I looked threw it and found a nice lacey thong that was dirty. I threw them in my shorts pocket and went to bed. All the next day on the way home I fingered them in my pocket, getting hard in the back of the car. When I got home I smelled em and they smelled great! Her ass smelled so divine, and her pussy had leaked out onto her thong and left some crusty bits I sniffed for probably 20 minutes straight! My cousins really cute and for the first time I beat off to her, god damn I came so much!! lol. It's not the first pair of panties I've taken from her though. Awhile ago, she had a family emergency and had to go back home earlier than expected, and left her bag at my house. I immediately went through her stuff and found a nice pair of panties, I still wear em every once in a while.

One of my buddies fiance has caught the brunt of it though, I've taken 4 of her thongs ( all dirty, two of em smelled like she wore em for a week, ooooooooooooo) and jerked off in another while they were gone and I was at their apartment.(That was a nice pair, with a nice white bow on the front) One pair of her panties had a bunch of her dried up juices all over it, and I still haven't worn that one yet, I still like to rub it on my face! Another pair of hers has a bunchhhhhh of dried juices on it, but I'm not so sure its all hers. I think she took a creampie and put em on, because there was just so much dried up thick stuff on the green pair. I also think this pair was REALLY fresh, like within a day. I got hard just looking at em and immediately smelled them. When I got home I licked em (pretty) clean and jizzed all over myself thinking about my buddies jizz and his fiance's juices mixed and in my mouth, awwhwhwhhw. SHE has a GREAT smelling ass, and she's smokin hot too. I like to wear her thongs when I go over to their house, lol. all her thongs were Hanes tho, they were kinda cheap cloth thongs, but they still feel good.

A few weeks before the wedding I went into my friends room while she was at the pool with her kid, and my buddy was taking a shower. I found a pink thong sitting on a chair kinda underneath some clothes, and I smelled it really quick to see if it was clean, and it wasn't! So, being full of adrenaline, I stuffed em down my pants (didn't have any pockets) and went and watched tv. Deciding I couldn't take a chance and I didn't want to get my smell all over them ( i hadn't showered in a few days - it was a partying binge) I took em out to my car and smelled them the entire way. Her ass smelled gooood, but not as good as my cousins. This pair doesn't fit as well as she is a TINY TINY chick and I'm about 6'3 225lbs. She is kind of a whore, most all my buddies have fucked her, some at the same time lol.

Another pair I got, which I think were unwashed when the chick wore them (I never met her) because when I wore them the pink dye had come off all over my gooch and ass. But I got this pair when I was over at my friends brothers apartment, and I walk in and there is a pink thong tac'd to the wall. I was like wtf, and my buddy said that "one of my brothers friends had sex on my bed and left these in the sheets". My buddies brother got sick of looking at em and took em down with a plastic bag, and threw them in the trash. So I naturally started planning my heist haha. I waited for the perfect chance when my buddy was sleeping (we were hung over as fuck) and his brother was taking a shower to dig in the trash and get em. I snagged em, but this was a close call, as his brother came out of the bathroom (which faced the kitchen trash can) I had just stashed em in my pocket, and since I've done this a few times, I had taken over a piece of trash to cover my tracks, lol. He had no idea. But this thong barely had any scent at all, I was kind of disappointed, as this chick was supposed to be a huge slut. oh well...

I've taken panties from my buddies wife when I helped em move. I snagged em out of the dresser when I carried something by myself. Too bad she doesn't like thongs or strings... oh well, she is a bitch.

I've also stolen two pairs of hotpants from my other buddies fiance. She is not attractive, and her pussy smelled like death, thank god for the washer... There may be more that I just can't remember now, if I remember them I'll post em on this thread!

There are a few more of my friends, buddies gf's/wives w/e that I need to get a pair from, and I'm always on the lookout. Feels good to tell people what I've done, hopefully someone else likes to do the same and can share some stories about it.

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@confessions
06 Apr 2010 1:09PM
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Well, I'm not the kind to kiss and tell, But I've been seen with Farrah!
I'm never seen with anything less than a nine. I will confess, I've been on fire with Sally Field,Gone fast with a girl named Bo, But somehow they just don't end up as mine. It's a death defyin' life I lead, I take my chances. I die for a livin' in the movies and TV. But the hardest thing I ever do is watch my leadin' ladies Kiss some other guy while I'm bandagin' my knee. I might fall from a tall building,
I might roll a brand new car.'Cause I'm the unknown stuntman that made Redford such a star. I never spend much time in school But I taught ladies plenty. It's true I hire my body out for pay, Hey Hey. I've gotten burned over Cheryl Tiegs, Blown up for Raquel Welch. But when I end up in the hay it's only hay, Hey Hey. I might jump an open drawbridge, Or Tarzan from a vine. 'Cause I'm the unknown stuntman that makes Eastwood look so fine. Sorry I had to tell someone!

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@funny
26 Sep 2011 11:19PM
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Two women in heaven .... 1st woman: Hi! My name is Sandra. 2nd woman: Hi! I'm Sylvia. How did you die? 1st woman: I froze to death. 2nd woman: How horrible! 1st woman: It wasn't so bad. After I quit shaking from the cold, I began to get warm & sleepy, and finally died a peaceful death. What about you? 2nd woman: I died of a massive heart attack. I suspected that my husband was cheating, so I came home early to catch him in the act. But instead, I found him all by himself in the den watching TV. 1st woman: So, what happened? 2nd woman: I was so sure there was another woman there somewhere that I started running all over the house looking. I ran up into the attic and searched,and down into the basement. Then I went through every closet and checked under all the beds. I kept this up until I had looked everywhere, and finally I became so exhausted that I just keeled over with a heart attack and died. 1st woman: Too bad you didn't look in the freezer---we'd both still be alive!!

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idickslapu
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@random
22 Jan 2015 8:48PM
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Most of the week has been rather slow. A grandma, some cancer patient, and 2 hobos.

Saturday night, and I could be going to the bar. Telling some gal she's my kind of lady. Not even wait to ask for her name if she's a little drunk.

(All of the sudden, we get a fresh one.)

Fucking bullshit. Fuck. I'm so tired of these damn corpses. When am I going to start saving up. Meet someone, someone rich too. There are so many fat girls out there willing to marry. And they are loaded. Whatever.

(I slap hands with the transport dude, Bill or something. He looks high all the time. He thinks we're really great friends too. But whatever, he's a pervert, just like me.)

(I do the routine. Take the bodybag to the refrigerated section. Someone will come looking for her Monday. Sunday, if she's lucky.)

What was on TV? Ah yes. A fight. Round sign girl is looking fucking tasty.

Suddenly, a thought pops into my head. "her".... "she".... I wonder who she is. Let me go grab the file. I don't even look at them anymore, God this is pathetic.

Name: Kelly Madison
Age: 16
Cause of death: Overdosed on Nembutal
...
...

I can't keep on reading. I have a fucking massive erection. I'm just going to peep. All I see are fucking grandmas and hobos. This is like, first time kind of thing. It's important. It's OK I feel like this right?

I'm a little scared of seeing a dead 16 year old. I should call her Kelly. Fuck, that turns me on even more.

Whatever, let's have a look.

Holy shit she's fucking fine. Why did this girl die?
She's barely into livor mortis. I really want to touch her abs. They are so perfect. OMG. My balls hurt. WTF. How am I blue balled from this shit???

(I take a lick at her abs all the way up to her tits.)

That taste. Fuck it, I'm cleaning her up right now!

(I rush through that shit like there is no tomorrow)

She's completely naked and clean on the table now. Rigor mortis should start kicking in soon. I want to eat her out. God she looks like an Angel.

(I slowly lick her. She's super dry. I stick my tongue all the way inside her vagina. She'd be the happiest girl in the world)

I wonder if she's a virgin. If she offed herself then she probably lost it to some moron and decided to end life as is. My God, this is the luckiest day of my life.

(I spit on my dick and start entering. I can imagine that pretty face moaning for me. I open her eyes so I can see them. They are rolled back a little bit, but I imagine is from the pleasure of my dick. Which hurts a bit because its really dry. I have to spit a lot.)

No blood. There wouldn't be anyways. She's so tight though.

(I fuck her really hard, put her legs on my shoulders. Stick her tongue out, drool on it, and make out with her while I fuck her rough. First time, I let myself go: I cum inside of her so hard while yelling "you ready Kelly? OMG i'm cumming baby")

Fuck that was hard. I don't think I can ever do that again. Not even lube would make that any more pleasant. Plus I nutted and I feel kind of bad now. Like sick bad.

Who am I kidding? Where's my phone? I'm going to video tape myself jerking off on her pretty face.

(She's so young and I can't stop playing with her nipples.)

I'd fuck her ass too, but rigor kicked in.

(I video tape me jerking off on her face, finish all over it. Spread it into her mouth. I find myself drooling of pleasure.)

Holy crap I could live like this.

*Phone rings*

me: Hey, Morgue here.
police station: We're calling from so and so police station, did you guys receive a girl's body?
me: Yeah, about 2 hours ago
ps: her parents didn't know where she was taken, they just found out. They are going over there right now to identify her. They are pretty devastated man, good luck with that.
me: fuck. yeah, I know the routine
(I'm looking at her face covered in my cum while saying this)
ps: have a good weekend man
me: thanks, you too

(I wipe the cum from her face. I feel like I want to leave the bit inside her mouth. )

I wish I could jerk it again. Or fuck her again.

Whatever. She'll be buried with my seed inside of her.

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@random
05 Dec 2009 10:33AM
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One random Friday I was sitting in my Chicago apartment drinking a beer and watching TV. Around 7, my phone rang. It was "Karen," one of my booty calls at the time. It was early so I was kinda confused; we normally never called each other until at least midnight, even on weekdays:

Tucker "You drunk already?"
Karen "Hehe. No baby. What are you up to right now?"
Tucker "Nothing. Watching Morimoto make some crazy mushroom cr�me brulee. Battle Porcini on Iron Chef."
Karen "Uhhh, OK. Well...I am going on some silly blind date tonight that my friend set me up on...but I was wondering if I could swing by your place and get a protein shake first?"

Very nice. Karen is obviously making an attempt to move up from Irregular Booty Call to Head Dick Sucker.

Tucker "Yeah, sure. Just come on by. I'll be here."
Karen "Cool. I'll see you soon."
Tucker "Hey baby--bring me some beer."

Not even ten minutes later, she rolled into my place...with a 12 pack of Miller Light. Karen's going to have to learn the difference between good beer and watered down horse piss if she wants to move up in my Ho Hierarchy.

She got right down to business because her date started in less than 30 minutes. I kept watching the Iron Chef, because come on, Morimoto is a genius. Plus, I've seen the show Karen was putting on before. It's really good, but it's been in syndication for months; you don't really need to pay attention till the ending.

I wasn't supposed to meet my friends until 10, so when she left around 8 I just kept drinking at my place. I started thinking about how fucking cool it was that I had a girl coming over to my place to suck me off before she went out on a date. I may not be Hugh Heffner, but I doubt many guys pull something like that off on a regular basis.

Then I started feeling bad for her date. This poor schmuck had no idea that the girl whose chair he was pulling out and buying dinner for and being nice to had her lips wrapped around my cock not even a hour earlier. God forbid if this poor dude kisses her goodnight. I wonder if it'll cross his mind that even with beer breath, her mouth shouldn't taste that salty.

But in a way, I didn't feel that bad for him. You can't make a ho into a housewife, and when you take one out on a date, you aren't helping your chances. I guess some guys never learn.

Of course, he had no idea what she was like; after all, that was the whole point of the date. I guess it just goes to show, you never really can tell...

OH SHIT!!

HOW MANY GIRLS HAVE DONE THIS TO ME??

I shot up from the couch in shock, spilling beer all over myself.

Has this ever happened to me? Have I ever been the sucker that took a girl out after she bought beer for another guy and then blew him?

Oh.My.God--it has to have happened to me. HAS TO. I've been out with so many women, there is just about no way that this hasn't happened to me. And considering the moral fortitude of many of the girls I've hooked up with--suspect at best, wretched prostitute at worst--it is damn near certain that I've been That Guy at least once.

I mean, if Karen does this for me, why not for other guys too? I am pretty fucking cool, but there are other cool guys in the world besides me. Or so my friends tell me. Plus, it's not like I've always known what I now know about women. I could have easily been the sucker many times in my life.

And why stop at dick sucking? How many girls have I slept with that were with other guys the same day as me? Or went from another guy right to me? With out even cleaning up?

I wouldn't even know would I? HOW? HOW THE FUCK WOULD I KNOW? There is no way I could tell, short of smelling the semen on her breath. Would I even smell it? Smell it--WHAT ABOUT TASTE IT?

Oh dear god. Please tell me that I haven't tasted it. I need to go vomit.

I stomped around my apartment for the two hours until I met my friends out. I explained the whole situation to them and they laughed, made fun of me, and told me to get over it. I wasn't having it:

Tucker "How can you be so cavalier about this? This is my mental health at stake! I can't be hooking up with seconds THE SAME DAY. That's for losers and douche bags, NOT Tucker Max!"
Friend "Well apparently not, Sloppy Joe."
Tucker "Aren't you just the comedian?"
Friend Tucker, haven't you done this to girls before? You know, fucked one in the morning, then gone out and picked up another and fucked her?"

This person is no longer my friend. Like I wasn't already mind-fucked enough tonight.

Tucker "SO WHAT? IT'S DIFFERENT!"
Friend "How?"
Tucker "BECAUSE IT'S ME!"
Friend "Wait--didn't you just get YOUR dick sucked tonight? And now you're out trying to get laid?"

Tucker "FUCK YOU!!"
Friend "Dude, it's happened to all of us, and we've all done it to others. Women are women, men are men. This happens to everyone."
Tucker "FUCK THAT. I AM TUCKER MAX. I AM BETTER THAN ALL OF YOU. THIS SHIT DOES NOT HAPPEN TO ME!"
Friend "Oh man; Is it going to be one of those nights with you?"

I drank, and drank, and drank, yet I was still unable to drown the thought that I'd been totally played by multiple women, and didn't even know which ones had done it to me.

That might have been the worst part--not knowing. Well, that and the prospect that I have at some point kissed a girl who still had semen caked to her teeth from 45 minutes ago. I know of at least one ex-girlfriend that cheated on me, but we were long distance and I fucked more than Caligula when I was dating her, so I wasn't pissed about that. But what about all those girls I thought were all wrapped up in me? How many of them fucked other people behind my back? Literally?

What also fucked me up was that women were doing the same thing to me that I was doing to them, except I didn't even know they were doing it. For the entirety of my life up to that point I thought I had the upper hand, that I was the player and not the playee when in fact, I was possibly just another chump. The illusion of control was shattered. Needless to say, this little revelation colored my perspective for the rest of the night. If by "colored my perspective" I mean "totally fucked me up beyond all repair."

Sometimes, too much to drink is still not enough. I needed therapy to bury my anxiety, and alcohol was going to be my counselor. Yes friends, this was going to be one of "those" nights.

At the first bar I went around quizzing girls about how often this sort of thing happens:

Tucker "Let me ask you a question: Have you ever sucked off one guy, then went on a date with another guy right after? Like that same night? Or fucked another guy right after you blew a different guy, but without telling the second one?"

Girl "EXCUSE ME?"
Tucker "Don't play coy with me."

As you can imagine, this made me very popular with the ladies.

At bar two, I ordered at least three rounds of shots in the first ten minutes. I kept making toasts like this one:

"Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
The bitch gave me head,
And some other guy too."

My toasts to cuckoldry got the attention of a group of girls, and they came over to talk to us. My friends, who had not yet consigned all the women of earth to a fiery death and eternal damnation, made up a story about me to explain my behavior. They told the girls that I had just broken up with my girlfriend who I was in love with and to not pay attention to anything I said. It was my first night out and I was bitter and mean. I helped enforce this lie with the toast I gave to the next round of shots:

"This shot feels so good, this shot feels so right,
I can't believe she fucked me and another guy tonight.
To drown my pain, I bought this alcohol at the store,
Because let's face it: All women are whores."

Greased by the bullshit story that I had been dumped, the girls actually thought that I was funny. One of them tried to console me by switching the subject to music. I told her I was a country music fan, which is not even remotely true.

Girl "Really! I like to make up my own lyrics to country music songs. Like, you know that one song, Let's Get Drunk and Screw? I like to pretend the lyrics are Let's Wait in Line for Shoes."
Tucker [I stare blankly at her for a good ten seconds]
Girl [Still trying to be cheery] "Isn't that funny?"
Tucker You are making me stupider."
Girl "What!?!?"
Tucker [Wait for it...wait for it...] "I bet you've sucked miles of dick."
She immediately turned away and as she walked off stuttered, "You're, you're...a JERK!"
Tucker "Have another shot? DON'T MIND IF I DO!"

That pretty much sealed our fate at bar two. Bar three presented some ample targets, but I was still too head fucked to do anything, so my friends planted me at a table and went looking for girls on their own.

After about three seconds I got bored and started wandering around. I snatched some pink drink off the bar as the girl who owned it looked the other way, took a sip, and immediately spit it out. A girl on the other side of me used this to initiate conversation:

Girl "Gross?"
Tucker "Yeah, it tastes like ass."
Girl "I like ass."
Tucker "What's your name?"

Had it been any other night, I would have turned this little gem into a tongue up my ass crack. Not tonight. Tonight, it was only a matter of time before I fucked it up.

Tucker "But be honest--would you ever eat out one guys ass and then come kiss me the same day?"

And I'm spent.

My friends were doing well with this one group of girls and looked to be on the way to hook-up victory...until I decided that I wanted to hear the sound of breaking glass, and we all got kicked out.

We ended up going to a late night club. When we got there, I was so drunk the bouncer almost didn't let me in. My last clear memory is my friend grabbing me at the bar after I ordered a double something, and trying to calm me down:

Friend "Dude, you've had too much. This is bordering on dangerous."
Tucker "The only dangerous amount is none!"
Friend "How many drinks did you have at the last place?"
Tucker "You're counting MY drinks? If you want to act like my liver accountant then you can pay the bill too."
Friend "I PAY YOUR BAR TABS ANYWAY!"
Tucker "I'M FAMOUS--WOMEN CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!"

They sat me in a corner and went back out on the prowl. One or two more drinks later, I decided that I was going to dance. Completely immersed in my indignant self-pity on the dance floor, I found my savior.

In the corner of the club, dancing alone, I found the person that I could trust. I found my one. My soul mate. The person who would never betray me and who would love me forever and never fuck anyone else behind my back without telling me.

This was the most gorgeous person I had ever seen. Piercing blue eyes and sandy blond hair. Great body. A deep, penetrating stare that belied a wisdom and understanding beyond the average person. Great charisma. And we had immediate chemistry.

I danced with them for an hour, giving them seductive looks, coyly flirting with them, seductively telling them how much I cared about them. And they responded to everything I offered by offering it back. Every smile was met with a smile, every caress with an equal response.

In my eyes, I finally found someone that I was in love with.

I was too drunk to realize this at the time, but my friends were watching me the whole time...and all they saw was me dancing in front of a huge mirror.

With myself.

And no one else within 10 feet of me.

Let me emphasize: I was so drunk, I was dancing WITH MYSELF in the mirror. For AN HOUR. NO ONE was near me.

Not only did I never once realize it, the only thing I remembered the next morning from that club was thinking that I'd fallen in love. For real, it took several of them to convince me that I was dancing alone, and not with the most amazing girl I'd ever met.

My friends also told me that later when the lights came on indicating closing time, I staggered out of the club onto the street, ran away from them, and their last sight was me careening down the street, bouncing off store fronts and parked cars, yelling:

"IF YOU WANT TO GO OUT ON A DATE WITH ME, YOU CANNOT FELLATE ANYONE ELSE FOR AT LEAST TWENTY-FOUR HOURS BEFOREHAND! DO YOU HEAR ME?? AND I WANT YOU TO SHOWER TOO! I HAVE STANDARDS!! BECAUSE I AM NOT A DOUCHE, YOU HAVE TO DOUCHE!!"

Now THAT is Tucker Max Drunk.

But unfortunately, Tucker Max Drunk is not free. At some point the bill comes due. How expensive is it? Let's tally the total:

You know it's been a hard night when you wake up totally dehydrated and still dizzy.

You know it's been a really hard night when you wake up dehydrated, drunk and dizzy and don't know where you are and have no memory of how you got there.

But it is only when waking from a truly Tucker Max Drunk night that you are completely dehydrated, still very drunk, too dizzy to stand, and though you don't know your exact location or how you got there, you do realize that you have just woken up OUTSIDE, in a PUBLIC PARK, with a stray dog LICKING YOUR FACE.

Raise your hand if you've ever had that happen to you.

I clawed my way to a park bench, pulled myself up onto it, and saw a huge Tin Man statue. For a split second, I honestly thought I'd died and hell was sponsored by Warner Brothers. That was a bit of a shock, because I'd always thought Disney would rule hell. Then I remembered: I lived right by a park called Oz Park, though until this moment it had not occurred to me where it got it's name.

Encouraged by the fact that I was close to my apartment, I started walking. After falling a few times and finally getting that damn dog to stop licking my face and following me, I found a street name I recognized, and followed it back to my apartment.

I was so concerned with keeping my balance and navigating correctly, I didn't really notice till I got home that my face and scalp were itching something terrible.

I was reaching up to discover the source of this itch as I stumbled in my door. My roommate took one look at me, audibly gasped and got that "Oh my god" face I've seen so many times. He usually lets out a laugh when he sees the after effects of one of my binges, but this time he was so shocked he could only cover his mouth, point and utter, "Go look in the mirror."

I felt my face, and there was definitely something sticky and hard crusted onto it. Thinking that it was possibly blood and I had sustained a head injury, I rushed to the bathroom, and there in mirror was rock bottom:

The "love of my life" stared back at me with a face covered in hardened, crusted vomit. Yellow and brown bile matted my hair, chunks were in my eyebrows and ears, my cheek and neck even had pieces of grass stuck in the vomit crust. I looked like some sort of botched special effect. So much for being too good for whores' sloppy seconds.

But the piece de resistance lay on the top of my head, at the edge of the crusted vomit, precariously stuck to my hair, still stuck to the vomit:

A small, dry, hardened dog turd.


POST SCRIPT

The repercussions of that night did not end there. First off, my (now ex-) roommate will call me shit-head for the rest of my life, and I deserve it.

Secondly, my friends rode me endlessly about dancing with myself in a mirror. I still don't know if I believe them though, because I could SWEAR it was a girl I was dancing with, and I thought I even kissed her. Oh well, let's hope I don't stare into a reflective body of water anytime soon.

But more importantly, I will never look at women the same way. Ever. This event, combined with a story my friend told me right after that about his ex-girlfriend letting herself get fucked by three Mexicans in front of him to get even for him cheating on her totally ruined me. Now, every time I look at or talk to a woman, I can't help but think to myself, "Has she already sucked a dick today? How recent was her last migrant worker gang-bang?"

Granted, I've done horrible stuff also, but anyone in the world can read this site and know what I've done. It's the not knowing that really messes with me. What fucks me up is to think that first dates or even other girls I'm casually dating are fucking around on me, and not even just on other days, but right before they see me. I don't really go on dates anymore since I learned that you don't need to spend money to get pussy, but when I did, I have to wonder how many girls came out with sperm breath. And how many of those did I kiss? And even now I wonder how many women have I met out at a bar who fucked a guy before going out, and then went home with me?

I talked to all my female friends about this, and the response was varied.

-The dumb ones were like, "Ohhhh--can I come over and suck you off too?" Yes you may. And bring beer.

-The na�ve ones were like, "A girl came over and sucked your dick before a date?? No girl does that!!" Riiiiight...and you've never had a boyfriend cheat on you. Go back to reading books you buy at the grocery store with Fabio on the cover and leave reality to the rest of us.

-I finally got some usable feedback from my smart female friends. Most of them were like, "This is news to you? That there are women who do what you do? Tucker, I thought you were smarter than this." Thanks for making me feel better.

One friend in particular summed it up: "At least you had this realization. Most guys go through life being blissfully ignorant. My girlfriends who juggle a lot of guys are the ones who don't give off any slutty vibe...which is how they totally get away with it. Every guy they are with thinks they've got the perfect situation--a sweet girl who comes over at midnight once or twice a week because that's all she wants. They don't understand that she's got the same perfect arrangement with four other guys."

I futilely tried to maintain that giving me head was so good that women actually wanted to do it and didn't care about getting anything back, but she just laughed. And she's right to laugh.

Not that sucking my dick is some chore--believe me I WISH I could go down on myself--but the idea that any guy is so much better than other guys that he is above the cuckoldry of a woman is ridiculous on face. Believe me guys: No matter how good you are, some girl has played you...and you probably didn't even realize it.

Don't think about this question for too long fellas, or it will drive you nuts. I fixated on it for a whole night and ended up dancing with myself in a mirror for an hour and then woke up in a public park with vomit crusted to my face and dog shit stuck to my head--trust me on this.

And the VERY best part? Karen and I never hooked up again. She ended up seriously dating the guy she met that night.

And he still doesn't know what was on her lips when they met...

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-16
Anonymous
@soapbox
06 May 2019 11:09PM
• 499 views • 1 attachment
[ − ] thread [ 9 replies ]

Perfect society

NO HUMANS

If humans exist

PERFECT HUMANS

WOMAN

No Breast
No Nipples
No Vagina
No Pubic hair
No Ass
Transient anus

MEN

No Penis
No nipples
No public hair
No ass
Transient anus

Religion banned
Weapons banned (never made)
No computers
No phone (including cellphones)
No internet
No video games
No radio
No tv
No cameras
No electronics

Punishments

Rape/molestation/sexual crime- castration
Theft- hands cut off
Murder- death
Peeping- eyes removedy

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@confessions
09 Nov 2015 9:04PM
• 3,817 views • 0 attachments
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When I was younger and chatrooms were still popular, I spent some time in local, state chatrooms. I chatted with a few women over the years, but had never worked up the courage to actually meet one in person. The internet still had a stigma attached to it back then and I guess I was just afraid of the potential consequences.

When I was 22, I began having a conversation with a 40 year old, married mom whom lived about an hour and a half from me. Her children were older so they were rarely home and her husband was deployed to Afghanistan. She told me that their relationship had been slowly deteriorating for months. She said the few times that she would get to talk to him, it often ended in an argument and that they were most likely headed for divorce once he returned home permanently.

She was a beautiful woman. She told me that before her husband had left, she was a bit heavier, but had worked her tail off to lose the extra weight. By the time we began chatting, she was down to I’d guess around 130 pounds—perfect for her five foot, seven inch frame.

We chatted for several weeks and would occasionally use the webcam. Webcam technology was still pretty new and the image was always laggy and blurry with no sound. As our conversations became more intimate, I would ask for her to show me different things. She was hesitant to show me her breasts. She explained how the weight loss had taken its toll on them. Reluctantly, she showed me. While I thought she was gorgeous either way, she was right. The radical change to her body had done wonders in other places, but the opposite was true in others.

One day, after having been absent from chat for a few days, she hopped on and said that she was sorry that she had been away. She said that she had had some surgery and wanted to show me something. She turned on her webcam and proceeded to take off her shirt and bra to show me that she had gotten breast implants. Like I said, I thought she was beautiful before, but now every inch of her body was perfect. She would definitely be causing heads to turn everywhere she went.

She told me that I was the first to see them and that she hoped I would see them in person someday. We exchanged phone numbers and within a day or two she texted me to tell me that she was in town to pick up her husband from the airport. His plane would not be coming in until the next day. She had gotten a hotel room downtown and had nothing to do so she wanted to know if I would want to meet to have coffee or something. I agreed to the meeting, despite being nervous as hell.

We had planned to meet at Starbuck’s. It was my hope to get their first simply so she would have to come up to me as I was scared to death to have to come up to her. When I arrived, I was too late. I could see her standing at the counter waiting for her order, but I could really only see her from the side. As I approached the counter from behind her, I heard the kid working the register tell her how beautiful she looked. She said thank you and turned around to see me standing there nervously. My jaw nearly hit the floor. She was stunning! She wore a tight tank tope that amplified her already amazing cleavage. She was also wearing those sexy, cat-eye glasses that I absolutely love on girls.

We awkwardly hugged and I placed my order before joining her out on the patio. We made small talk for well over an hour. It was getting later in the afternoon—early evening. I asked if she wanted to go somewhere and get some dinner. She agreed so we walked a few blocks to a nice Italian restaurant where we had a nice dinner and a few drinks. We continued to make small talk for another good while before I finally paid the check and waited to see where things went next.

I nearly jumped for joy when she asked if I would like to go back to her hotel room and order a movie or something. We walked to her hotel and as we were going up the elevator, yet another guy commented on how beautiful she was. He looked at me jealously as if he knew what was going through my mind.

We entered the room and we both made ourselves comfortable on the bed. She turned on the TV and began searching the pay-per-view titles for a movie to watch. She could’ve turned on anything at that point—I didn’t care. She picked a movie and we began to watch. While I do remember the name of the movie, I couldn’t tell you anything about it as my mind was racing a hundred miles an hour.

We lay there for about forty-five minutes to an hour in silence—except for me getting up to go to the bathroom every ten minutes because I was so damn nervous. Finally, I figured it was now or never so I gently began to caress her cheek with the back of my hand before leaning over and kissing her. This lead to a very passionate make out session before I asked if I could finally see the work that she done.

She lifted her shirt over her head and I wrapped my arms around her back to unclasp her bra. I threw it to the floor, exposing the biggest, most perfect pair of breasts that I had ever been this close to. I asked if I could touch them or if they still hurt too much for them to be handled. She said that she had taken some painkillers as soon as we returned to the room so it would be fine. I gently placed my hands on them being very careful not to be too rough. However, she insisted that she was fine and such delicate care was not required. I continued to fondle her as we kissed, our tongues swirling in and out of each other’s mouths. I lowered my head and carefully licked her breasts, churning my tongue around her nipples.

She told me to lie back and relax. She removed her shorts leaving on the lacey, pink panties that she wore. She undid my belt, unbuttoned my jeans and slowly slid down my zipper. She was somewhat surprised by the fact that I wasn’t wearing underwear, but this only slowed her a second as she took my cock in to her hand. She stroked it gently before lowering her head to give it a lick. She slid her tongue down the length of it stopping at the base to take my balls in to her mouth. She slid back up and whirled her tongue around the head before finally taking the whole thing in to her mouth.

It was pure ecstasy! I had never felt anything like this—the things she could do with her tongue! I desperately tried to recite baseball statistics in my head to keep from cumming too soon so that I could enjoy this for as long as possible. I gave the best effort that I could before finally exploding in to her mouth. It was the most intense orgasm I had ever had. She swallowed it all and smiled as she came up and rested her head on my chest. She must have been able to feel how fast my heart was racing.

We laid there for a few minutes. The entire time she was gently playing with my now soft cock in her hand. After a few minutes, I was hard again and she began stroking me harder. I tried to slide my hand into the front of her panties, but she cut me off and resisted my advance. I told her how bad I wanted to fuck her. She said that she wanted me too, but unfortunately, it was just not a convenient time of the month to do so. So she continued to just stroke my cock for a few minutes.

I was as hard as a rock; throbbing in her hand when suddenly, she stopped and excused herself to the bathroom. I hedged my bets and assumed this was simply and excuse to make preparations as she wanted to fuck as badly as I did. I reached down and took my wallet from my pants that were still lying on the end of the bed. I removed one of the condoms that I had bought on my way to meet her in hopes that something like this would happen. I had been so nervous about what this encounter would be like that I bought those condoms with the desensitizing lubricant to help ensure that you can last longer. I took one and placed it on the corner of the nightstand.

A moment later she returned from the bathroom, having removed the pair of panties that had blocked me from getting to her pussy earlier. She was ready, and so was I. She noticed the condom that I had placed on the nightstand. Standing next to the bed, she took the condom and unrolled it down my penis before climbing on top of me and guiding me in to her pussy.

We fucked forever—in every position imaginable. If it hadn’t been for the extended pleasure condom; I know I only would have lasted a couple of minutes, if not a few seconds. I eventually reached the point where I desperately wanted to cum, but the condom was working all too well. I knew that if I kept it on, I was never going to climax.

Remembering one of our more intimate conversations from Yahoo, I knew that doggy style was her favorite position so I asked if we could do that next. She happily climbed up on all fours and I took my position behind her, discreetly removing the condom in the process. We were facing the mirror so I could see the look on her face as I slid my now naked cock inside of her. She could tell right away what I had done, but didn’t seem inclined to care. I began thrusting harder and harder and told her that I was going to cum. In the slightest whimper, she said, “I want you to cum inside me, baby.”

That was the moment of no return as I thrust my cock one last time and pulled her as close I could by her ass. I unloaded inside of her before we both finally collapsed on the bed. We continued to lie there, now in the dark; kissing and fondling each other before finally falling asleep in each other’s arms.

We spent the entire next day texting back and forth about the encounter and how incredible it had been for both of us. Later that week, she told me that she was going to be coming back to the city to return her husband to the airport. She asked if she could stay with me once she was rid of him. At this point in time I had just returned home from college and was still living with my parents. I was too embarrassed to tell her, so I essentially just dodged the question and explained that I would be busy. Our messages became fewer and fewer over the next couple of days before just finally ending altogether.

To this day, I still think about this night and recreate it in my mind. About a year ago, right before my own wedding, I decided to see if I could find her. All I had to go on was a first name, an old cell phone number that was no longer in service, and the screen name she had used on Yahoo Messenger.

After some creative Googling, I managed to find her Facebook profile. I discovered that she was now living in another state as her husband had been reassigned. They were still married; apparently living much happier than she was at the time of our meeting. I sent her a friend request, but she never responded. I took this to mean that it was best to leave well enough alone. I still check in on her Facebook page from time to time. I have since learned that her son is right around my age and that her daughter, only a couple of years younger than me, is as gorgeous as her mother.

I wish that I could simply tell her how much that night meant to me, but I wouldn’t want to risk jeopardizing her marriage or my own. I am left with the lasting memory in the back of my mind and very few days pass that I do not recall that evening and wish that I would have met her again the following week like she wanted to.

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Anonymous
@confessions
18 Feb 2014 5:43PM
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I guess it all started when my daughter was about ten years old. My wife
and I were divorced for about a year by then. We had a rather amicable
divorce considering some of the horror stories some of the guys I worked
with told. In any case she ended up with custody of Jenny, our
daughter. On this day, her mother dropped Jenny off at my apartment for
my weekend visitation. My ex-wife, Amanda and I chatted for a bit than
she kissed Jenny on the cheek and told her to be good. Jenny just
rolled her eyes and whined about always being good which gave both her
mother and I a little chuckle.

Jenny at ten was a very intelligent, bright, and of course, mischievous
little girl. She was very assertive and even at that age, knew how to
manipulate people, especially her "Daddy". The only time she used
"Daddy" was when she wanted something from me or was in big trouble with
her mom and she needed me to be on her side. The rest of the time, she
just called me Dad. I guess it’s fare to say that she had me wrapped
around her little finger. I knew it, but I felt guilty that I wasn't
there for her all the time since the divorce so I guess I over
compensated for my absence.

One thing that she always liked to do was to sit on my lap while we
watched TV together. We always watched football together but we also
liked watching the movies on cable as well. Of course, she always
wanted to use her "Daddy" as a recliner. Sometimes it got uncomfortable
for me, especially as she got older, but she would look at me with those
puppy dog eyes and the pout and say,

"Oh please Daddy?"

Of course I always gave in. This time was no different.

We finished eating dinner and began settling in for the evening. She
had just finished her shower and came bounding into the living room in
her favorite sleeping outfit; a San Francisco 49’s football jersey that
came just below her cute upturned butt, little white cotton panties, and
socks, folded down to her ankles. The football jersey was one of those
cut-off ones so the length fit her fine (just below the tops of her
thighs), but the sleeves came all the way down to her wrists. She
looked absolutely gorgeous with her light brown hair with striking, sun
bleached, blonde streaks, now plastered down wetly over her shoulder and
framing the pixie little features of her face. Thick, dark, expressive,
eye brows curved over her big, sparkling, hazel eyes that had the look
of innocence and mischievous intent all at the same time. Her smooth
long legs, that seemed to get longer every time I saw her, reached out
from under the hem of her outfit. She’d always had an air of
nonchalance to her. An unawareness of her beauty that made her even
more beautiful. Right then, I could easily imagine Amanda at her age
looking just like her.

There was some movie on cable that she had wanted to watch so we made
some popcorn together and sunk into the couch for the movie. Before
long she climbed into my lap with the popcorn on hers and wiggled down
on to me. She turned her head, looking up at me with an impish smile.

"You comfy?" I said.

Her grin widened, giggled, then turned back to the movie, hand to mouth
with more popcorn.

During the movie (I still can’t remember a thing about it) she kept
wiggling around in my lap eating her popcorn. She’d occasionally turn
with a hand full of popcorn in her hand, and feed it to me. Sometimes
she’d drop some of it, which would fall between us. She’d giggle
teasingly and say,

"Daddy, your such a messy eater", then fish her little hand between us
groping to retrieve the fallen popped kernels.

I could feel her searching fingers wiggling around between my legs and
behind her butt, the back of her hand pressing against my balls. My
cock immediately sprang to life, growing hard and long, like a viper
awaken from its lair. I was shocked at the suddenness of my erection,
not to mention that it was my ten year old baby girl that was the cause.
I froze, not knowing what to do. I shifted to one side, turning my hips
slightly, hoping to encourage Jenny to change her position to one lap or
the other so that she couldn’t feel my now rock hard shaft thumping
between her panty clad ass cheeks. Jenny on the other hand had made her
mind up that she liked it just where she was and turned to frown at me
and gave a disapproving whine, wiggling her ass harder down on my crotch
for emphasis. My heart was beating like a racehorse.

"My god, she must of felt my hard throbbing cock just then, what the
hell am I going to say to her." I thought.

My mind was in a panic, trying furiously to think up something, anything
to say. All the while admonishing myself for being sexually aroused by
my own daughter, trying fruitlessly to will my cock to go soft. Nothing
coming to mind, and fighting a loosing battle with my renegade member, I
waited for the inevitable.

I didn’t know what Jenny was thinking or how she might react. Did she
know anything about sex? Has her mother spoken to her about the "birds
and the bees"? Would she scream, glare at me accusingly and hate me
forever? All of it was racing through my mind in an instant and for
what seemed an eternity.

Just then, Jenny turned her head, squirming as she did, and smiled that
familiar mischievous smile. I glanced down at her beautiful laughing
eyes and nervously smiled back at her. Did she notice anything? Had
she turned and smiled at me knowingly or was it just a smile of victory
in the battle for seating position? I didn’t know and my cock didn’t
care. All "it" felt was the warmth of Jenny’s soft, supple ass cheeks
encased around it. A shift of her body causing renewed enthusiasm as
her ass wiggled and glided over its length. I could feel the pre-cum
gurgling up through my shaft and oozing out from the tip.

I then noticed something that had escaped my panic stricken mind. I had left my copy of the Book of Mormon on the outside patio. The Book of Mormon is the word of God, like the Bible. It is Holy Scripture, with form and content similar to that of the Bible. Both books contain God's guidance as revealed to prophets as well as religious histories of different civilizations. While the Bible is written by and about the people in the land of Israel and surrounding areas, and takes place from the creation of the world until shortly after the death of Jesus Christ, the Book of Mormon contains the history and God’s dealings with the people who lived in the Americas between approximately 600 BC and 400 AD. The prophets in the Book of Mormon recorded God's dealings with His people, which were compiled by a prophet named Mormon onto gold plates.

Before these faithful Christians perished, their record was safely hidden away. Joseph Smith obtained these ancient records in 1827, and with the gift and power of God Joseph was able to translate the ancient writings into what we have today. The Book of Mormon, along with the Bible, testifies that Jesus Christ is our divine Redeemer and that by living according to His gospel we can find peace in this life and eternal happiness in the life to come.

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